The Sierra Wrestling All-Stars Thread, CRITICAL Edition

As the lights go down and we return to the show, suddenly Rob Zombie's In the Age of the Consecrated Vampire We All Get High blares from the sound system as "Nasty" Adam Nishimura swaggers down the entrance ramp, casually tossing his sunglasses to a ringside attendant before grabbing a microphone.

Adam: "Y'know, with the Escalation tournament over, that means the big dance is just around the corner. That's right, Sunday, October 27th! Breakdown! But there's a problem..."

Adam counts off on his fingers.

Adam: "We know That Bobby Wilder won Escalation, so he's going to fight Adrian Rose for the Aftermath Title. We know So-Cal Squad have unfinished business with the Power Plant. We know the lovely Mieko-chan-"

He pauses to wink and make finger guns at the camera

Adam: "-is going to be defending the Joshi title against Brianna Dalton. Mieko, babe, stop leavin' me on read. But where's the prettiest princess of 'em all? The grand belt pillow? Is the SWA Openweight Champion trying to show up to the big dance without a partner? C'mon, Kazuo, I would've figured you had something to say after I got my Nasty on all over your cute little gal pals right in the center of this ring, in front of a screaming crowd of freaks last night."

Adam grins and lowers the microphone as a chorus of boos erupts from the audience. The booing only intensifies when he seemingly gets bored and starts making some... uh... gestures at a woman in the front row. When she responds with the double birds, he raises the microphone to speak again.

Adam: "I'm the coolest, the handsomest, the Nastiest challenger you could ask for. So how about we do this thing, huh, Champ? How about you come get yourself a taste of the Baddest Boi on the Block?"

"Black Connection" by Camp Lo starts to play from the speakers as the crowd jumps to their feet in surprise and excitement! The SWA Openweight Championship adorns the waist of Kazuo "Chrome" Saji. He is decked in all black business casual wear with the exception of his trademark "Chrome" sunglasses. He smirks and walks down to the ring. Unlike Adam, he holds onto his sunglasses before taking a microphone and starting to walk around the ring. He makes eye contact with Adam, occasionally shakes his head in disgust, and finally rolls into the ring and throws his hands up to pop the crowd.

Saji: "See, I'm trying to be a better person. My mentor, RYOMA, says that means looking at people from all angles. But even with my little promenade around the ring, I just can't see you as anything other than a piece of nasty shit."

The crowd "ooooohs"

Saji: "You think pinning Shannon like that makes you a playa? Boy, it makes you a poser. Cause anyone who legit gets tail knows how to wrestle a woman without embarrassing themselves. Act like you been there, bro. I bet you went home, got face down on the bed, and called Murderer's Row with your feet dangling in the air telling them 'you touched your first lady.'"

The crowd is laughing at this but Saji doesn't appear to be joking. He takes his belt off his waist and puts it over his shoulder.

Saji: "But hey, you got my attention right? That's not so easy these days, what with the Chrome Championship tour absolutely bangin' all around the world. What am I up to now? Five defenses - damn, it feels like your boy Cielo's reign was a decade ago. How's he livin? They lettin him play shuffleboard at the home? You want me to sign something for him: a little souvenir?"

Saji laughs dismissively as the crowd eats this up. Then Saji looks at his belt and at Adam, nodding.

Saji: "But look, I actually like what SWA is doing here. Someone backstage thought it would be a feel good moment if a runt stepped up to challenge me. That's inspiring for everyone, right? 'Anyone has a chance' if they can walk to the ring without tripping over their own two feet. So who put you up to this? One of those production interns? Catering? Did they get you all pumped up to put your big boy pants on and challenge the Champ? This is your first time doing that, right? Does that mean I have to buy you dinner after our match? I hope you like soup cause those teeth gonna be decrepit after a Chrome Splitter."

The microphone shoots back up to Nishimura's mouth with the speed of a coiled viper as he advances a step closer to Saji, the threat of the physicality undercut slightly by Saji's broader physique and calm confidence.

Adam: "You listen you motherfu-"

Nishimura cuts himself off, but not before the fans start chanting "Quarter in the swear jar!" at him. He seethes for a moment, waiting for the chant to taper off.

Adam: "Wait wait wait I see what's going on here. No wonder you're the Champion. You're shaping the narrative. Twisting things around to tell the story you want told. Let me take a moment to pop that little bubble you got goin'; because right now, you can't afford to overlook a guy like me. You've been all over calling yourself one of the hardest working men in wrestling, but there's two sides to that coin, ain't there? Even the idiots here-"

He jerks a thumb towards the crowd, eliciting a fresh round of booing

Adam: "-have noticed you ain't exactly at 100% these days. You just got dropped on your stack of dimes not that long ago by Bak Fu over in UBL, didn't ya? Well, I'm good at two things, breaking bedframes, and breaking necks. So, Champ, how 'bout we test that neckbone of yours? You think you can stand up to a little Cervical Fusion? Or, when I'm done with you, will you be just like your little buddy Shannon, flat on your back with me on top of you?"

Saji reaches his right hand over to the back of the neck, feigning discomfort. Then he tears off what looks to be a cooling pad and offers it to Nishimura who does not react.

Saji: "Bro - here's a gift. It's like a cold shower and massage all in one. Cause it's not my neck you should be worried about, it's your wrist. You been overusing it thinking of BHB."

The crowd roars in laughter as Saji smirks and puts the pad in his pocket..

Saji: "Maybe ease up on that bedframe watching my ubble videos too. Wouldn't want old man Cielo hitting your floor from below with a broom. Then again, it's me who will do the sweeping when I beat each member of Murderer's Row."

The crowd ooohs again and Saji steps closer to Nishimura.

Saji: "Here's something you just can't understand from the cheap seats. Any Champion will never be 100% if they actually doing the work. You wanna play Operation and point to my injuries? Hell, I'll have my doc give you the full run down. It won't matter. I'm not overlooking you cause my radar only picks up threats. This is my title and you have as much chance at taking it from me as you do getting tail without paying for it. Call it 'narrative' if it helps you sleep better at night on that shitty bedframe of yours. Later, bitch."

Saji leaves the ring and walks backstage to cheers from the crowd.