Post by Ripley on Jul 16, 2018 23:43:51 GMT
A Brief History
June 2014:
JR Tower Observation Deck T38, Saporro City, Hokkaido, Japan
Will Craddock sat across from his mentor, Daisuke Sonoda. The bespactled Sonoda ran a hand through his shock of greying hair, glancing down at the coffee-stained sheet of paper in front of him, then at Craddock. Then back at the paper.
“So, you’re telling me you don’t want to wrestle for me anymore? I brought you up in this business, Craddock-san.” Sonoda placed his glasses on the table and narrowed his eyes.
“Well, I mean—no, y’didn’t.”
“I—“
“Let’s call it what it is, Sonoda-san: y’helped. Y’ taught me a lot ‘n I ain’t denyin’ that. Y’ did it yer own way by bludgeonin’ me ‘alf tah death wit’ god-damned light tubes ‘n forks night in ‘n night out, but ya didn’t ‘make’ me or bring me up in this business—”
Sonoda slams his sake down, raising a hand to interject.
"With all respect, Craddock-san—"
“Calm down ‘fore y’ burst a damned blood vessel, Sonoda-san. Believe me, I couldn’t-a done it without ya. I was a name ‘fore I came here. I’m not sayin’ I didn’t need ya. I did. Y’taught me so much. I stole half yer damn moveset.”
Sonoda furrows his brow, contains a small chuckle by taking a sip of his drink, lets Craddock continue. Craddock, however, is silent for a minute. He peers over Sonoda’s shoulder, taking in the whole of Saporro City—the unmistakable NORBESA Ferris Wheel the main attraction among a backdrop of office buildings and a smatter of technicolour; arcades, bars, dance clubs, and cars speeding along wide roads. Somewhere, off in the distance, Craddock knows the mountain looms beyond the heavy fog, beyond the heavy skyline. His feet are familiar with it. Every Saturday, Sonoda would burst into his tiny apartment with hiking equipment on; two coffees in hand, and they’d hike as much of it as they could.
Craddock continues after a long sigh.
“I ‘prreciate everythin’ ya’ve done fer me. An’ it’s been a lot. Y’ taught me ‘ow tah run a promotion—‘n ‘how not tah run one. Y’ taught me ‘ow tah work a deathmatch. Ya god-damned took me tah the ‘ospital when that dickhead Ichi slashed a god-damned artery. Y’ made sure other promoters treated me well. Y’ let me work my own style when we figured out deathmatches weren’t workin’ fer me, y’know? An’ I think I taught ya some shite back.”
Sonoda nods and a smirk gives way to a surprisingly soft laugh. “Smash Brothers and some English, yes.”
“Exactly. And I ain’t never gonna forget what ya’ve done fer me, but I can’t—I think it’s time, Sonoda-san. I’m spendin’ ‘alf my time ‘ere, rentin’ an apartment in Toron’o, basically givin’ Nikki rent money tah not even live there. ‘N she’s not even livin’ there ‘alf the time herself. I’m startin’ tah get a name back in the UK wit’ PROGRESS, wit’ SMASH in Canada. It’s getting’ tah the point that I can’t do much else, y’know? I’ve done pretty much everythin’ I can do ‘ere ‘n at the end of the day, I’m still a Gaijin, y’know?”
“You go to bigger promotion. ZIP JAPAN?”
Craddock laughs. “After the shite we pulled on ‘em? Even if that was a storyline, y’ really think the ZIP fans’ll like me? Christ, Sonoda. I know y’ been hit in the head a lot, but come on. They’ll fuggin’ kill me. Believe me, I love it here, I really do, but the UK’s still my home, Sonoda-san. I gotta go back ‘ome. Not just fer me, fer Nikki, fer the UK scene. Fer my own sanity. I needa be home. Just look at this—my official resignation 'n a 'business plan', I guess y'd call it.”
Sonoda simply nods. After a prolonged silence the two rise from their seats and spend the rest of the night wandering the city. Ten hours later, Craddock is on a plane back to the UK.
June, 2015:
Rhydyfelin Community Centre, Pontypridd, Wales
“And yer first ever SHTCW:a champion: Will Craddock!”
A smattering of cheers lazily rises and just as quickly dies in the small, echo-y hall with roughly 35 people in it.
As Craddock raises his the title in his hands and climbs the top turnbuckle, he is blindsided by two bears and a pig: Animal Farm.
However, Craddock’s opponent, a bloodied Nikki Knux raises to her feet and dumps both the bears to the outside of the ring with clotheslines before she sets her sights on the pig. The pig backs away, only to back into Craddock, who decimates him with a Rolling Elbow. The pig staggers back towards Knux and his clocked with a straight punch, which leaves him crumpled in a heap in the middle of the ring. Knux and Craddock embrace, then both jump up on the turnbuckles to little to no fanfare.
The crowd has gone home. In the parking lot, Craddock is packing things away in his Mini Cooper.
“They just witnessed ‘istory an’ that’s the appreciation I get? That SHE GETS?”
Craddock motions towards Nikki Knux, who now is in street clothes, chugging a Gatorade, blood still caked in her hair.
The man who played the pig, also known as BIG HAM, is taking a long drag of a cigarette.
“Well, I mean—it was kinda shite. Ya got a buncha blokes in animal costumes takin’ over the show after you ‘n yer Mrs. are high-fivin’ all the kids one minute and then just beat the ever-lovin’ piss outta each other for 25 minutes. In small-town Wales, no less. This ain’t fuckin’ R/Squared Circle, Will. It’s Pontypridd, Wales. Ya wanna have somethin’ like PROGRESS, but then ya wanna have somethin’ like CHIKARA. Ya don’t know what the fuck ya want to do, so yer out on yer arse looking like a fuckin’ prick.”
“Eh, fugg you, Ollie.”
The next month in Wrexham, Animal Farm is not seen again. The two bears make one more appearance that night in a tag team tournament, where the Scott Brothers, two young men from Canada who trained with Nikki Knux, debut to send the last remnants of Animal Farm packing.
It has been one year since Will Craddock left Japan. In that year, he has wrestled throughout the United Kingdom, Canada, and periodically the United States, as well as brief returns back to Japan. A career that started in small town Wales has come full-circle in barely five years: Cardiff to Liverpool to London to Toronto to Tokyo to Hokkaido to London to Liverpool to Toronto to nowhere permanent. An apartment still in Toronto that he doesn’t need, doesn’t pay for. He has won multiple championships by himself and alongside Nikki Knux. He doesn’t know what to do with this promotion.
January, 2016: SHTCW:a Finds an Identity.
Trallwn Community Centre, Swansea, Wales
In the months since that talk with Oliver, SHTCW:a has solidified what it wants to be—embraced its strange, seemingly disparate influences.
In any given show, its ever-growing audience is just as likely to witness a half-hour classic that blows up among “smarks” as it is a comedy tag-team match between two Blacksploitation-inspired cops and the underdogs from small-town Canada, the Scott Brothers.
It is on this show that in the main event, Nikki Knux gains the championship in one of those classics against Will Craddock. The two clobber each other with simultaneous Rolling Elbows, but Knux is smart enough to collapse onto the prone body of Craddock for the three-count. The crowd is barely more than 75 people, but the swelteringly-hot community centre erupts.
Craddock and Knux continue to fight over the belt off-and-on for months. Off-and-on because despite the groundswell of support for SHTCW:a, it still struggles to regularly book shows.
None the less, the two carry the main-event scene throughout the summer and well into the Fall until Craddock takes what looks like a routine bump at a show in Newcastle and jams his neck. Badly. Surgery. He’s out for months.
Knux soldiers on, takes on all comers, makes the best of the opportunity by applying her trade not only in SHTCW:a, but in PROGRESS, in SMASH in her native home of Toronto, Canada. And she proudly wears the ornate, over-the-top pink and black SHTCW:a world title belt wherever she goes.
January, 2017: Craddock Returns, New Blood is Injected into SHTCW:a.
Bradmore Community Centre, Wolverhampton, England
Will Craddock is still nowhere to be found, but a “Red Dragon” has appeared on the main event scene and been feuding with champion Nikki Knux since November. It all culminates on night one of a two-show gig for SHTCW:a in Wolverhampton in a title-versus-mask match. Knux uses Craddock’s own Cardiff City Special (Dragon Sleeper) and the Red Dragon collapses. It’s revealed, not so surprisingly, that Craddock is Red Dragon. The next night, Craddock and Knux have a rematch and Craddock seems to be closing in on the title when he’s attacked by an unknown assailant. He has no biases, though, and takes out Knux as well.
Two weeks later, in Birmingham, the assailant reveals himself to be CJ Fresh, a young kid from Philadelphia who has been making waves on the independent scene in America. He’s immediately thrown into a non-title match versus Nikki Knux and beats her to earn himself a title shot. The next night, the Scott Bros., the only tag champions the SHTCW:a has ever seen, suffer a huge loss when Corum suffers a devastating shoulder injury and they’re forced to relinquish their titles. The Beat-Alls step into the picture and win the titles in an impromptu tournament held in their home town of Liverpool, and Craddock wins his second title in the triple-threat match between himself, Knux, and Fresh.
In her rematch the next month in Manchester, Knux falls to Craddock, due to a distraction on the outside from CJ Fresh. Fresh and Knux fight on night two of the two-night card in Manchester and again, Fresh has Knux’s number. He reveals that he only wants to beat Craddock for the title and has his match set for June.
Unfortunately, harsh business realities hit SHTCW:a and their summer shows are canceled. They come back, though, in October, “sponsored” by OSWALD MEGACORP. Matches are presented by brands associated with OSWALD MEGACORP. and shenanigans are afoot as the Oswald MegaCorp. Tiger inserts himself firmly into the lucha division’s upper ranks and a new ref, seeming to be some kind of cyborg and brandishing the OSWALD MEGACORP. logo works a lot of matches.
Craddock and Fresh face off in arguably SHTCW:a’s best match to date. Fresh comes within an inch of defeating the champion, but finds himself unable to beat Craddock. The lights go off and when they’re back on, both Fresh and Craddock are found in a heap in the middle of the ring.
In the coming months, Craddock defends the title against newcomers like Fergus Gray, Marcel Müller, and old-time veteran Milkshake Jones, even one of his mentors in the UK scene: Bobby Donnelly. On that night, the Donnelly Family makes its debut and Saoirse Donnelly, the first and so-far only graduate of the SHTCW:a wrestling school defeats El Gringo Fantastico in the card opener.
In the go-home show of the “season”, everything comes full-circle as Craddock faces off against Nikki Knux for the title again. And again, the two are attacked. This time, by a giant of a man who looks to be “enhanced”—literally made of chrome. Intrepid internet sleuths figure out that the man looks a lot like Crusher Stevens, a UK independent vet who had made a one-off appearance for SHTCW:a months before. In the weeks following the show, cryptic messages are posted on SHTCW:a’s website and social media about a “hostile takeover.”
On December 21st, 2017, what was so strongly-rumoured before is made official:
FROM THE OFFICES OF Charles estlin Oswald, OSWALD MEGACORP.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE TO THE PRESS
SHTCW:a World Championship
CURRENT CHAMPION: Mayday Malone
June 11th, 2015 - January 11th, 2016: Will Craddock (1)
January 11th, 2016 - February 17th, 2017: Nikki Knux (1)
February 17th - December 21st, 2017: Will Craddock (2)
December 21st, 2017: Title Vacated'
January 13th, 2018 - April 21st, 2018: Mayday Malone (1)
April 21st, 2018 - May 10th, 2018: Marcel Müller (1)
May 10th - May 10th, 2018: Kemper Tierney (1)
May 10th - June 28th: CeO (1)
June 28th - Present: Mayday Malone (2)
SHTCW:a Tag Team Titles
CURRENT CHAMPION: The Soul Cops
November 14th, 2016 - February 17th, 2017: The Scott Bros. (1)
February 17th, 2017 - June 15th, 2017: The Beat-Alls (1)
June 15th, 2017 - October 27th, 2017: The Scott Bros. (2)
October 27th - December 21st, 2017: The Beat-Alls (2)
December 21st, 2017: Title Vacated
February 24th, 2018 - July 5th, 2018 : The Beat-Alls (3)
July 5th, 2018 - Present: The Soul Cops
SHTCW:a Lucha King/Queen
CURRENT King/Queen: Besos
February 3rd, 2018 - May 10th: Lady Bird
May 10th - June 7th: Enigmatica
June 7th - Present: Besos
PREVIOUS SHOWS:
EPISODE ONE (A NEW HOPE):
EPISODE TWO (LUCHA IS FOR EVERYONE!):
EPISODE THREE (WRESTLING IS A LASERQUEST):
EPISODE FOUR (GREATEST HITS LIVE!):
EPISODE FIVE (CATCH ME IF YOU CATCH-AS-CATCH-CAN):
EPISODE SIX (of infinite suplexes and infinite beards):
EPISODE SEVEN (No One Man Should Have All That Power):
EPISODE EIGHT (Whys And Wherefores):
EPISODE NINE (43 / 142 PURO x SHTCW:a):
EPISODE TEN (Wet Hot American Wrestling):
EPISODE ELEVEN (FUTURE IMPERFECT):
SEASON ONE FINALE (RAGE, RAGE AGAINST THE DYING OF THE LIGHT):
June 2014:
JR Tower Observation Deck T38, Saporro City, Hokkaido, Japan
Will Craddock sat across from his mentor, Daisuke Sonoda. The bespactled Sonoda ran a hand through his shock of greying hair, glancing down at the coffee-stained sheet of paper in front of him, then at Craddock. Then back at the paper.
“So, you’re telling me you don’t want to wrestle for me anymore? I brought you up in this business, Craddock-san.” Sonoda placed his glasses on the table and narrowed his eyes.
“Well, I mean—no, y’didn’t.”
“I—“
“Let’s call it what it is, Sonoda-san: y’helped. Y’ taught me a lot ‘n I ain’t denyin’ that. Y’ did it yer own way by bludgeonin’ me ‘alf tah death wit’ god-damned light tubes ‘n forks night in ‘n night out, but ya didn’t ‘make’ me or bring me up in this business—”
Sonoda slams his sake down, raising a hand to interject.
"With all respect, Craddock-san—"
“Calm down ‘fore y’ burst a damned blood vessel, Sonoda-san. Believe me, I couldn’t-a done it without ya. I was a name ‘fore I came here. I’m not sayin’ I didn’t need ya. I did. Y’taught me so much. I stole half yer damn moveset.”
Sonoda furrows his brow, contains a small chuckle by taking a sip of his drink, lets Craddock continue. Craddock, however, is silent for a minute. He peers over Sonoda’s shoulder, taking in the whole of Saporro City—the unmistakable NORBESA Ferris Wheel the main attraction among a backdrop of office buildings and a smatter of technicolour; arcades, bars, dance clubs, and cars speeding along wide roads. Somewhere, off in the distance, Craddock knows the mountain looms beyond the heavy fog, beyond the heavy skyline. His feet are familiar with it. Every Saturday, Sonoda would burst into his tiny apartment with hiking equipment on; two coffees in hand, and they’d hike as much of it as they could.
Craddock continues after a long sigh.
“I ‘prreciate everythin’ ya’ve done fer me. An’ it’s been a lot. Y’ taught me ‘ow tah run a promotion—‘n ‘how not tah run one. Y’ taught me ‘ow tah work a deathmatch. Ya god-damned took me tah the ‘ospital when that dickhead Ichi slashed a god-damned artery. Y’ made sure other promoters treated me well. Y’ let me work my own style when we figured out deathmatches weren’t workin’ fer me, y’know? An’ I think I taught ya some shite back.”
Sonoda nods and a smirk gives way to a surprisingly soft laugh. “Smash Brothers and some English, yes.”
“Exactly. And I ain’t never gonna forget what ya’ve done fer me, but I can’t—I think it’s time, Sonoda-san. I’m spendin’ ‘alf my time ‘ere, rentin’ an apartment in Toron’o, basically givin’ Nikki rent money tah not even live there. ‘N she’s not even livin’ there ‘alf the time herself. I’m startin’ tah get a name back in the UK wit’ PROGRESS, wit’ SMASH in Canada. It’s getting’ tah the point that I can’t do much else, y’know? I’ve done pretty much everythin’ I can do ‘ere ‘n at the end of the day, I’m still a Gaijin, y’know?”
“You go to bigger promotion. ZIP JAPAN?”
Craddock laughs. “After the shite we pulled on ‘em? Even if that was a storyline, y’ really think the ZIP fans’ll like me? Christ, Sonoda. I know y’ been hit in the head a lot, but come on. They’ll fuggin’ kill me. Believe me, I love it here, I really do, but the UK’s still my home, Sonoda-san. I gotta go back ‘ome. Not just fer me, fer Nikki, fer the UK scene. Fer my own sanity. I needa be home. Just look at this—my official resignation 'n a 'business plan', I guess y'd call it.”
Sonoda simply nods. After a prolonged silence the two rise from their seats and spend the rest of the night wandering the city. Ten hours later, Craddock is on a plane back to the UK.
June, 2015:
Rhydyfelin Community Centre, Pontypridd, Wales
“And yer first ever SHTCW:a champion: Will Craddock!”
A smattering of cheers lazily rises and just as quickly dies in the small, echo-y hall with roughly 35 people in it.
As Craddock raises his the title in his hands and climbs the top turnbuckle, he is blindsided by two bears and a pig: Animal Farm.
However, Craddock’s opponent, a bloodied Nikki Knux raises to her feet and dumps both the bears to the outside of the ring with clotheslines before she sets her sights on the pig. The pig backs away, only to back into Craddock, who decimates him with a Rolling Elbow. The pig staggers back towards Knux and his clocked with a straight punch, which leaves him crumpled in a heap in the middle of the ring. Knux and Craddock embrace, then both jump up on the turnbuckles to little to no fanfare.
The crowd has gone home. In the parking lot, Craddock is packing things away in his Mini Cooper.
“They just witnessed ‘istory an’ that’s the appreciation I get? That SHE GETS?”
Craddock motions towards Nikki Knux, who now is in street clothes, chugging a Gatorade, blood still caked in her hair.
The man who played the pig, also known as BIG HAM, is taking a long drag of a cigarette.
“Well, I mean—it was kinda shite. Ya got a buncha blokes in animal costumes takin’ over the show after you ‘n yer Mrs. are high-fivin’ all the kids one minute and then just beat the ever-lovin’ piss outta each other for 25 minutes. In small-town Wales, no less. This ain’t fuckin’ R/Squared Circle, Will. It’s Pontypridd, Wales. Ya wanna have somethin’ like PROGRESS, but then ya wanna have somethin’ like CHIKARA. Ya don’t know what the fuck ya want to do, so yer out on yer arse looking like a fuckin’ prick.”
“Eh, fugg you, Ollie.”
The next month in Wrexham, Animal Farm is not seen again. The two bears make one more appearance that night in a tag team tournament, where the Scott Brothers, two young men from Canada who trained with Nikki Knux, debut to send the last remnants of Animal Farm packing.
It has been one year since Will Craddock left Japan. In that year, he has wrestled throughout the United Kingdom, Canada, and periodically the United States, as well as brief returns back to Japan. A career that started in small town Wales has come full-circle in barely five years: Cardiff to Liverpool to London to Toronto to Tokyo to Hokkaido to London to Liverpool to Toronto to nowhere permanent. An apartment still in Toronto that he doesn’t need, doesn’t pay for. He has won multiple championships by himself and alongside Nikki Knux. He doesn’t know what to do with this promotion.
January, 2016: SHTCW:a Finds an Identity.
Trallwn Community Centre, Swansea, Wales
In the months since that talk with Oliver, SHTCW:a has solidified what it wants to be—embraced its strange, seemingly disparate influences.
In any given show, its ever-growing audience is just as likely to witness a half-hour classic that blows up among “smarks” as it is a comedy tag-team match between two Blacksploitation-inspired cops and the underdogs from small-town Canada, the Scott Brothers.
It is on this show that in the main event, Nikki Knux gains the championship in one of those classics against Will Craddock. The two clobber each other with simultaneous Rolling Elbows, but Knux is smart enough to collapse onto the prone body of Craddock for the three-count. The crowd is barely more than 75 people, but the swelteringly-hot community centre erupts.
Craddock and Knux continue to fight over the belt off-and-on for months. Off-and-on because despite the groundswell of support for SHTCW:a, it still struggles to regularly book shows.
None the less, the two carry the main-event scene throughout the summer and well into the Fall until Craddock takes what looks like a routine bump at a show in Newcastle and jams his neck. Badly. Surgery. He’s out for months.
Knux soldiers on, takes on all comers, makes the best of the opportunity by applying her trade not only in SHTCW:a, but in PROGRESS, in SMASH in her native home of Toronto, Canada. And she proudly wears the ornate, over-the-top pink and black SHTCW:a world title belt wherever she goes.
January, 2017: Craddock Returns, New Blood is Injected into SHTCW:a.
Bradmore Community Centre, Wolverhampton, England
Will Craddock is still nowhere to be found, but a “Red Dragon” has appeared on the main event scene and been feuding with champion Nikki Knux since November. It all culminates on night one of a two-show gig for SHTCW:a in Wolverhampton in a title-versus-mask match. Knux uses Craddock’s own Cardiff City Special (Dragon Sleeper) and the Red Dragon collapses. It’s revealed, not so surprisingly, that Craddock is Red Dragon. The next night, Craddock and Knux have a rematch and Craddock seems to be closing in on the title when he’s attacked by an unknown assailant. He has no biases, though, and takes out Knux as well.
Two weeks later, in Birmingham, the assailant reveals himself to be CJ Fresh, a young kid from Philadelphia who has been making waves on the independent scene in America. He’s immediately thrown into a non-title match versus Nikki Knux and beats her to earn himself a title shot. The next night, the Scott Bros., the only tag champions the SHTCW:a has ever seen, suffer a huge loss when Corum suffers a devastating shoulder injury and they’re forced to relinquish their titles. The Beat-Alls step into the picture and win the titles in an impromptu tournament held in their home town of Liverpool, and Craddock wins his second title in the triple-threat match between himself, Knux, and Fresh.
In her rematch the next month in Manchester, Knux falls to Craddock, due to a distraction on the outside from CJ Fresh. Fresh and Knux fight on night two of the two-night card in Manchester and again, Fresh has Knux’s number. He reveals that he only wants to beat Craddock for the title and has his match set for June.
Unfortunately, harsh business realities hit SHTCW:a and their summer shows are canceled. They come back, though, in October, “sponsored” by OSWALD MEGACORP. Matches are presented by brands associated with OSWALD MEGACORP. and shenanigans are afoot as the Oswald MegaCorp. Tiger inserts himself firmly into the lucha division’s upper ranks and a new ref, seeming to be some kind of cyborg and brandishing the OSWALD MEGACORP. logo works a lot of matches.
Craddock and Fresh face off in arguably SHTCW:a’s best match to date. Fresh comes within an inch of defeating the champion, but finds himself unable to beat Craddock. The lights go off and when they’re back on, both Fresh and Craddock are found in a heap in the middle of the ring.
In the coming months, Craddock defends the title against newcomers like Fergus Gray, Marcel Müller, and old-time veteran Milkshake Jones, even one of his mentors in the UK scene: Bobby Donnelly. On that night, the Donnelly Family makes its debut and Saoirse Donnelly, the first and so-far only graduate of the SHTCW:a wrestling school defeats El Gringo Fantastico in the card opener.
In the go-home show of the “season”, everything comes full-circle as Craddock faces off against Nikki Knux for the title again. And again, the two are attacked. This time, by a giant of a man who looks to be “enhanced”—literally made of chrome. Intrepid internet sleuths figure out that the man looks a lot like Crusher Stevens, a UK independent vet who had made a one-off appearance for SHTCW:a months before. In the weeks following the show, cryptic messages are posted on SHTCW:a’s website and social media about a “hostile takeover.”
On December 21st, 2017, what was so strongly-rumoured before is made official:
FROM THE OFFICES OF Charles estlin Oswald, OSWALD MEGACORP.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE TO THE PRESS
It is with great honour that we announce our purchase of Super Hyper Turbo Championship Wrestling: alpha today. As many people know, we have been affiliated with the upstart promotion for several months now—assisting with procuring the funding for venues, for talent, etc. And we are invested in not only the growth of this tremendous promotion here in the UK, but wrestling as a whole. This acquisition of Super Hyper Turbo Championship Wrestling: alpha marks the first chapter in a long and fruitful march towards bringing some of the best wrestling in the world to fans in a way that only OSWALD MEGACORP. can; with the best resources built by OSWALD MEGACORP. Not only will SHTCW:a see its production quality increase, but this acquisition will allow for the SHTCW:a wrestling school to flourish, and partnerships with other promotions worldwide grow. This acquisition also includes the purchase of the archival tapes of many SHTCW:a competitors throughout their careers, including Will Craddock’s stint in BLOOD JAPAN.
With this new acquisition and the end of this season from SHTCW:a, OSWALD MEGACORP. sees the need for a fresh start. New champions. New divisions. New rules. New opportunities.
As such, effective immediately, the SHTCW:a World Championship and Tag Team Titles will be vacated. A luchador division will be formed, with its inaugural title holder to be determined soon. We will also not only be more lenient in our rules than before, but allow for the talents of more “hardcore” wrestlers such as Lady Dirtbag, No Name, Patches, and Kemper Tierney flourish in specialty hardcore and deathmatches.
OSWALD MEGACORP. and SHTCW:a are excited to kick off the first season of this new reboot in the home of SHTCW:a, Cardiff.
With this new acquisition and the end of this season from SHTCW:a, OSWALD MEGACORP. sees the need for a fresh start. New champions. New divisions. New rules. New opportunities.
As such, effective immediately, the SHTCW:a World Championship and Tag Team Titles will be vacated. A luchador division will be formed, with its inaugural title holder to be determined soon. We will also not only be more lenient in our rules than before, but allow for the talents of more “hardcore” wrestlers such as Lady Dirtbag, No Name, Patches, and Kemper Tierney flourish in specialty hardcore and deathmatches.
OSWALD MEGACORP. and SHTCW:a are excited to kick off the first season of this new reboot in the home of SHTCW:a, Cardiff.
ROSTER/TITLE HISTORY/MISC.
Will Craddock:
Your Comic Book Hero, the Welsh Wrecking Ball, Will Craddock is a world-traveled, multi-time SHTCW:a champion. Craddock moved from the small village of Pontypridd, Wales to Cardiff, Wales, then finally to Liverpool in England and spent his formative years fighting tooth and nail in back alleys. At only 16, the undersized Craddock broke into wrestling and gravitated towards the the "deathmatch" style to set himself apart from many of the catch-as-catch-can wrestlers and powerhouses on the UK independent scene. At the young age of 22, Craddock moved to Japan to take on the Japanese deathmatch scene, but very quickly adjusted his style as he was booked more and more—partially due to nagging neck problems that eventually required surgery, partially due to wear-at-tear, and mostly to due with simply gravitating towards a more traditional "strong style." By 25, Craddock transitioned to living part-time in Japan and part-time in North America, and transitioned to a strong-style inspired offense in the ring; utilizing stiff kicks and elbows that he'd learned in Liverpool and honed in Osaka. By 2016, he traded time mostly among independent UK promotions whilst focusing mainly on the SHTCW:a and helped establish SHTCW:a's upper card.
Saoirse "The Belfast Bombshell" Donnelly:
The Belfast Bombshell, Saoirse Donnelly is the first graduate of the SHTCW:a Wrestling School. Trained by Will Craddock and Nikki Knux, she made her debut on the 2016 "season finale" show against El Gringo Fantastico and won convincgly. She shows a great upside and has been receiving training from her legendary father, Bobby Donnelly as well.
Fyfe Donnelly:
The son of Bobby and Rose Donnelly and brother of Saoirse Donnelly. Fyfe Donnelly debuted a few months before his sister Saoirse but unfortunately has not found his footing in SHTCW:a. He has done well on the UK scene, but there is a lot of pressure on him to live up to his massive potential and the name of his clan.
CJ Fresh:
The New Fresh Prince. The King of Soul Style. Wrestling's Millenial Michael Jordan. CJ Fresh. Puro-influenced, fresh AF kid from south Philly, CJ Fresh has won over the SHTCW:a crowd with a series of fantastic matches with Will Craddock and Nikki Knux. He made his name in America, but he exploded on the UK scene when he attacked Will Craddock back in late March 2016. He floundered recently at the ZIP JAPAN Super Z Cup but hopes the new year brings his focus back on the SHTCW:a championship.
Lady Dirtbag:
The First Lady of Dirt. The motherfucker. The dadfucker. Lady Dirtbag is arguably one of the best deathmatch workers going who was, originally trained, by Will Craddock, surprisingly enough. It wasn't until she learned of Craddock's past with BLOOD JAPAN that she took on her moniker and changed her style drastically to become the deathmatch icon she's known as today.
Nikki Knux:
A boxing/submission-based badass who has transitioned from boxing to MMA to wrestling. The multi-disciplinary Canadian is not only a one-time SHTCW:a champion, but the real-life partner of Will Craddock. Alongside Craddock, she brought SHTCW:a to prominence and continues to dominate the upper card.
Mayday Malone:
The Pinch Hitter, Mayday Malone is a fan-favourite in SHTCW:a who constantly puts on solid matches no matter her position on the card. She is also the current SHTCW:a World Champion and only the second multi-time champion in the company's history.
Marcel Müller:
The Stuttgart Submission Machine! Marcel Müller is one of Germany's premiere exports on the wrestling scene and builds up to his devastating WünderArmbar (of which he has several variations.) He was relatively unproven in the SHTCW:a and as held multiple championships in his native Germany and has been putting on excellent matches in SHTCW:a's midcard. At the beginning of the new SHTCW:a season, he shot up the rankings and won the SHTCW:a World Championship before being screwed out of it by CeO.
Mr. Piledriver:
The King of the Piledriver, Mr. Piledriver is a high-flying lucha who was once best friends with both Mr. Brainbuster and Señor Powerbomb, but their petty squabbles over who had the best maneuevers got the best of them and they've been sworn enemies ever since, trying to prove whose area of expertise is the most effective in wrestling.
Svetlana Svensdottir:
The bringer of Ragnarok, Svetlana Svensdottir is a Scandinavian-born tank of a woman who may secretly be the strongest competitor in SHTCW:a. She only has one match in SHTCW:a under her belt—a double-countout draw with Fergus Gray in which both competitors knocked each other out outside the ring—but has been making a name for herself throughout all of Europe.
Broham:
The Broiest Bro in all of Brofessional Wrestling. Broham generally opens the card in SHTCW:a shows and is considered a comedy character, but has a surprising amount of strength.
Recently he has teamed up with Beef McHugeBulk to form The Bulk Bros and has found great success in doing so.
Beth Excellent:
The Beth in the World. The Bethellence of Bethecution. 1/2 of the Atomic Blondes, an infrequent tag-team with Regan O'Reilly. Beth Excellent is a submission-based blonde bombshell who will twist you into a pretzel and you will like it. She is arguably, the best submission-based wrestler in SHTCW:a and put on a series of fantastic matches with Marcel Müller that made fans start to take her seriously.
"Dastardly" Darrik Davies:
A relatively unsuccessful heel, Darrik Davies proclaims that he is the WOAT: Worst of All-Time. That is, he is a bad dude. But his win-loss record may prove that he is indeed the worst of all-time.
El Gringo Fantastico:
Though technically part of the lucha division under OSWALD MEGACORP.'s new rules, El Gringo Fantastico denies all association with luchadom and actively tries to wrestle the "anti-lucha" style in protest of his fellow luchas. He has been relatively unsuccessful in not only the win column, but keeping the high-flying lucha action down.
Bronson Fury:
The former MMA competitor-turned wrestler, the Brighton Beast. Bronson Fury is a homegrown talent from the UK that tore up the MMA world before taking the wrestling world by storm. He made his official SHTCW:a debut by decimating Darrik Davies back in November 2017 and took Nikki Knux to a countout draw in December 2017 and looks poised to inflict pain upon the SHTCW:a roster in 2018.
Fergus Gray:
The Big Gray Guy. The Celtic Clobberer. This towering Scot has been with SHTCW:a since nearly the beginning and recently turned heel when he felt that he wasn't getting the respect he deserved. The big man not only delivers a devastating lariat, but can fly as well. He could be a dark horse competitor in the SHTCW:a and quickly rise to the top of its rankings.
Daisha Lee:
Sister of Desmond Lee and self-proclaimed "Catch-as-Catch-Can-Queen", Daisha Lee was trained by Bobby Donnelly and trained very well. She has made a name for herself on the UK independent scene and is poised to try to do the same in SHTCW:a.
Beef McHugeBulk:
The Prince of Protein Shakes. The Swollest of them All. The King of Swole Style. Beef McHugeBulk is the oiliest, sexiest, stealin'-your-girliest wrestler in all of SHTCW:a. He has all the looks in the world, and arguably he has the talent to back it up. He's put on some solid matches since his arrival in early 2016 to SHTCW:a and wants the fame and lifestyle that comes with being a champion.
Mr. Brainbuster:
The one-time friend of the Kings of the Piledriver and Powerbomb respectively, it was Mr. Brainbuster that took things too far and started the seemingly eternal-war between the three. Mr. Brainbuster is out to prove that his preferred method of offense is the best in all of professional wrestling.
No Name:
Not much is known about this man other than he has some of the most vicious striking capabilities going in the SHTCW:a. He has, since his debut on only the fourth SHTCW:a show, compiled impressive wins over the likes of El Hijo Del 8-Bit, Kemper Tierney, Mayday Malone, Lady Dirtbag, CJ Fresh, and even a non-title win over Will Craddock.
Patches:
Patches was a former children's television presenter on the hit kid's television show in the mid-1990s until recently, "Clownin' Around with Patches the Clown", but the pressure eventually got to him after nearly 25 years on the job, and he snapped, assaulting one of the cameramen on set. British TV giant Sky let Patches, real name Oliver "Ollie" Hutchinson, go without explanation. Patches re-emerged in SHTCW:a some months later and CeO attempted to hire the clown under threat of releasing the tape in question of the assault. Patches declined the invitation and released the video himself "because [he] had nothing to lose anyway." The video promptly went viral within mere hours, causing a massive controversy at Sky Kids that resulted in "Clownin' Around with Clowny the Clown", the follow-up to "Clownin' Around with Patches the Clown" to not only be canceled, but the entire production team—the same team that ran "Clownin' Around with Patches the Clown" to be sacked. It was also reveleaed that the camera man in question was paid off, and several members of Sky's HR department and legal team were sacked as well.
Regan O'Reilly:
1/2 of the infrequent tag team, The Atomic Blondes, the Boston native Regan O'Reilly is a suplex and striking machine whose looks betray a bevvy of offensive talent. She is one of the best in the SHTCW:a who is just waiting to have her breakout performance.
Kemper Tierney:
A no-nonsense, towering Amazon of a woman, the self-proclaimed "glamrock queen" Kemper Tierney was a one-time fan-favourite in SHTCW:a who went on a massive losing streak before last season of SHTCW:a. She shocked the audience by not only debuting a new look, but an entirely new moveset and attitude and decimated Mayday Malone, putting Malone on the shelf for several months using her Sickle Hold submission. Ever since, she's been on a tear in SHTCW:a.
She won the SHTCW:a World Championship only to be screwed out of it by CeO. Her allegiances are currently unknown.
Señor Powerbomb:
The King, the Master of the Powerbomb, Señor Powerbomb is the mortal enemy of both Mr. Piledriver and Mr. Brainbuster, out to prove that the Powerbomb is the most devastating move in all of professional wrestling.
Yōkai:
Reportedly the former Joshi freelance sensation, GoGo Tanaka, Yōkai has been a fierce competitor in SHTCW:a since day one, utilizing deadly technique combined with harsh kicks and finishing her opponents with the Briding Figure-Four Leglock. She recently competed in the inaugural FPWA World Cup and though things didn't go her way there, she is SHTCW:a's first-ever NO LIMITS Champion, scoring four CRITS in a row before losing out to PEWA's Tomas.
Alouette:
A relative newcomer on the SHTCW:a scene, Alouette debuted in late 2016 and was signed as part of the new lucha initiative when OSWALD MEGACORP. announced its purchase of SHTCW:a.
She consisently puts on fantastic matches, is a fan favourite, and a contender for the LUCHA CROWN.
DYANMO TIGRESS:
Most certainly not the alter-ego of Midnight Brown, DYNAMO TIGRESS is a high-flying sensation who burst onto the SHTCW:a scene by defeating crowd favourite El Hijo Del 8-Bit and continued to put on fantastic matches throughout her tenure in SHTCW:a so far. She is seldom seen, but when she does make an appearance, she wows the audience every time.
El Hijo Del 8-Bit:
The international 8-bit lucha sensation. You gotta blow on him to make him work sometimes. El Hijo del 8-Bit is a fan favourite in SHTCW:a and has been since day one. He utilizes his high-flying offense to excite the crowd and has in the past put up a fantastic fighting effort against some of SHTCW:a's best.
EL SWAMPO:
Not much is known about EL SWAMPO, a relatively obscure lucha who only appeared in one show early in SHTCW:a's history. She(?) disappeared for months, only to resurface in late 2017 against Oswald MegaCorp. Tiger, where she laid down and let the Tiger pin her.
Recently she has been making more appearances for SHTCW:a.
Enigmatica:
A relative newcomer for SHTCW:a, Enigmatica made a name for herself in Mexico and is steadily building up a reputation for putting on fantastic, high-flying matches. She is a former SHTCW:a LUCHA CROWN holder.
Fantasma Azul:
A beloved hero in his native Mexico, this undersized luchador is part-time at the moment in SHTCW:a, but is an international superstar with not only his own action figures and television series, but even his own cereal. He's kind of a big deal.
Flash the Mighty:
The Saviour of the Universe, Mighty Flash! A quintessential underdog lucha who simply lives to put on a good show for the SHTCW:a crowd.
Golazo:
The beautiful luchador inspired by the beautiful game, Golazo is a new signee for the SHTCW:a's lucha division.
Lady Bird:
Another relative newcomer to the SHTCW:a lucha scene, not much is known about Lady Bird, but she is a former LUCHA CROWN holder.
Machismo:
The manliest lucha in all of the SHTCW:a, Machismo has picked up key wins over several of the SHTCW:a's best-known names and looks to continue his success in this new season of SHTCW:a.
Orchid:
One of the premiere luchadoras in SHTCW:a, Orchid quickly became a fan favourite after a series of matches against Enigmatica tore the house down late last year and she looks to continue that momentum into this new season.
Polaris:
The North Star of professional wrestling, Polaris is a Canadian ex-pat who made his way to SHTCW:a with the influx of Canadian talent in Nikki Knux, The Scott Bros., and dalton taylor. The oversized lucha is arguably one of the lucha divisions hardest hitters and has earned himself a bit of a reputation as the division's premier bad guy.
Rent-a-Tiger:
SHTCW:a's low-budget, affordable tiger extraordinaire, Rent-a-Tiger is an enhancement talent that the fans adore.
Tachyon:
Part of the Intergalactic Time Pirates, the Intergalactic Time Lucha is a fan-favourite in SHTCW:a and a Intergalactic Lucha Champion.
dalton taylor:
The Lower East Side Splatter Punk, dalton taylor is a lucha-inspried punk from the Prairies of Canada. taylor is a part-time worker in SHTCW:a who was convinced to make the trip alongside Nikki Knux, whom he trained with in Canada.
Thunderbird:
Part of the mass immigration of Canadian talent, the native warrior luchadora is solidly in the middle of the SHTCW:a pack.
AMERICAN REVOLT
Buddy Carmichael and Ricky Carmichael:
The Carmichaels were a relatively successful tag-team in America before coming over to SHTCW:a. In their debut match they beat The Scott Bros. and were immediately given a title shot in a tornado tag team match vs. The Scott Bros. and The Beat-Alls. They unfortunately couldn't reproduce their debut success but continue to stay high in the tag-team ranks.
THE BEAT-ALLS
John Pepper and George Eggman:
Arguably the best tag-team in SHTCW:a that took the tag titles off of the Scott Bros. and feuded with them for months leading up to Corum Scott's shoulder injury. Pepper is a clasically-trained catch-as-catch-can submission master whilst Eggman provides the strength for the vicious tag-team.
They are a multi-time tag title-winning team.
THE FLY BOYS
Falconer Northwest and Orville "Lefty" Holloway:
Former WWII pilots turned wrestlers, The Fly Boys are down-to-Earth, red-blooded Americans who just fight for the love of their country and now for the love of beating people up. They've been middle of the road so far in SHTCW:a.
INTERGALACTIC TIME PIRATES
Crash Mezzanine and Persephone Pollux:
Not much is known about this mysterious crew of time pirates other than their successes in Intergalactic Wrestling Warfare, where they have reigned as tag champions through both time and space since The Mesozoic Era and well into the Post-Post-Post Apocalypse.
THE YOUNG LIONS OF LEEDS
Desmond Lee and Rory Warwick:
Arguably the best tag-team in SHTCW:a, The Leeds Young Lions have not won the tag-team gold yet but are just on the cusp and show a bonafide mean-streak and intelligence that belies their relative inexperience in the business. The two work not only amazingly well as a unit, but as singles wrestlers too. It is only a matter of when, not if, that the Young Lions grab SHTCW:a gold.
THE RUDE DUDES WITH 'TUDE
Cadillac Callahan and Tommy Buick:
The Rude Dudes With 'Tude haven't seen much success in SHTCW:a, but recently turned heel on the fans and their change in attitude may be what finally gets them some wins.
THE SCOTT BROS.
Caleb and Corum Scott:
The inaugural SHTCW:a tag-team champions, Caleb and Corum Scott are the quintessential underdog tag-team from small-town, Timmins, Ontario. Both young men were trained alongside Nikki Knux and dalton taylor. The two were riding a long high of wins before an unfortunate shoulder injury to Corum meant they had to vacate their titles. Ever since they've been trying to regain the gold they never lost.
THE SOUL COPS
Midnight Brown and Milkshake Jones:
Two undercover cops from the 1970s who somehow found their way to SHTCW:a in a quantum time conundrum that they can't quite understand. Milkshake Jones has fully embraced this and revels in his new-found moniker of the Soul Brother of SHTCW:a whilst Midnight Brown just wants to get back to her time where she was bustin' heads and solvin' cases. Milkshake loves the spotlight, so these two were an infrequent tag team until a mystical amulet was bestowed upon them by a mysterious force and they used it to win the SHTCW:a Tag Team Titles.
Charles e. Oswald:
Charles estlin Oswald, the CEO of OSWALD MEGACORP. and owner of SHTCW:a. Oswald often does not like to get involved in the ring and was, until recently, not involved whatsoever. As of the purchase of SHTCW:a, though, Oswald weaseled himself into a World Championship tournament and then a title shot. He held the title for several shows before finally losing it to the woman who originally beat him in the World Championship tournament, Mayday Malone.
Crushtron 3000:
Formerly known as UK independent scene journeyman Crusher Stevens, the Ipswich-native was taken under Oswald's wing, and against his will was "enhanced" to become the ruthless cyberg known as Crushtron 3000. He debuted in December 2017, attacking CJ Fresh and Will Craddock in the main event of the "season finale." Since then he has served as CeO's henchman, ruining the SHTCW:a roster.
Bobby Donnelly:
A catch-as-catch-can legend in British Wrestling, Bobby Donnelly not only formed the wildly successful and revolutionary tag-team with his wife Rose, The Donnelly Dynasty, but captured many single titles in a career spanning over 30 years. He also had a large hand in training Will Craddock before Craddock went to Japan. He is now semi-retired.
Rose Donnelly:
The mother to Saoirse and Fyfe Donnelly and wife and tag partnet of Bobby Donnelly. Rose Donnelly is, arguably, one of the best female wrestlers of all-time, and rather tragically, one of the greatest "what-if" stories in professional wrestling. She was on top of the wrestling world in the mid-to-late-80s and looked poised to become a legend when a freak injury sidelined her for over a year. Rather than return to the ring, she took care of her children and stayed retired until her mid-40s. She took up teaching wrestling and still ocassionally tagged with Bobby and remains semi-retired.
EL ZOMBIEDOR: An undead lucha who originally made a one-off appearance for a Halloween show and returned for two more shows after his bite caused a wrestler to bleed and "turn" undead. EL ZOMBIEDOR had control over their henchman for that brief moment in time, but eventually lost to El Hijo Del 8-Bit and has not been seen since.
Red Dragon II: Totally not El Hijo Del 8-Bit, Red Dragon II is a mythic hero of SHTCW:a who was bestowed the moniker by Red Dragon. He is mostly inactive.
Red Dragon: The former alter-ego of Will Craddock, Red Dragon feuded with Nikki Knux and was eventually unmasked in a mask vs. title match when he passed out to his own move, the Dragon Sleeper.
Will Craddock:
Your Comic Book Hero, the Welsh Wrecking Ball, Will Craddock is a world-traveled, multi-time SHTCW:a champion. Craddock moved from the small village of Pontypridd, Wales to Cardiff, Wales, then finally to Liverpool in England and spent his formative years fighting tooth and nail in back alleys. At only 16, the undersized Craddock broke into wrestling and gravitated towards the the "deathmatch" style to set himself apart from many of the catch-as-catch-can wrestlers and powerhouses on the UK independent scene. At the young age of 22, Craddock moved to Japan to take on the Japanese deathmatch scene, but very quickly adjusted his style as he was booked more and more—partially due to nagging neck problems that eventually required surgery, partially due to wear-at-tear, and mostly to due with simply gravitating towards a more traditional "strong style." By 25, Craddock transitioned to living part-time in Japan and part-time in North America, and transitioned to a strong-style inspired offense in the ring; utilizing stiff kicks and elbows that he'd learned in Liverpool and honed in Osaka. By 2016, he traded time mostly among independent UK promotions whilst focusing mainly on the SHTCW:a and helped establish SHTCW:a's upper card.
Saoirse "The Belfast Bombshell" Donnelly:
The Belfast Bombshell, Saoirse Donnelly is the first graduate of the SHTCW:a Wrestling School. Trained by Will Craddock and Nikki Knux, she made her debut on the 2016 "season finale" show against El Gringo Fantastico and won convincgly. She shows a great upside and has been receiving training from her legendary father, Bobby Donnelly as well.
Fyfe Donnelly:
The son of Bobby and Rose Donnelly and brother of Saoirse Donnelly. Fyfe Donnelly debuted a few months before his sister Saoirse but unfortunately has not found his footing in SHTCW:a. He has done well on the UK scene, but there is a lot of pressure on him to live up to his massive potential and the name of his clan.
CJ Fresh:
The New Fresh Prince. The King of Soul Style. Wrestling's Millenial Michael Jordan. CJ Fresh. Puro-influenced, fresh AF kid from south Philly, CJ Fresh has won over the SHTCW:a crowd with a series of fantastic matches with Will Craddock and Nikki Knux. He made his name in America, but he exploded on the UK scene when he attacked Will Craddock back in late March 2016. He floundered recently at the ZIP JAPAN Super Z Cup but hopes the new year brings his focus back on the SHTCW:a championship.
Lady Dirtbag:
The First Lady of Dirt. The motherfucker. The dadfucker. Lady Dirtbag is arguably one of the best deathmatch workers going who was, originally trained, by Will Craddock, surprisingly enough. It wasn't until she learned of Craddock's past with BLOOD JAPAN that she took on her moniker and changed her style drastically to become the deathmatch icon she's known as today.
Nikki Knux:
A boxing/submission-based badass who has transitioned from boxing to MMA to wrestling. The multi-disciplinary Canadian is not only a one-time SHTCW:a champion, but the real-life partner of Will Craddock. Alongside Craddock, she brought SHTCW:a to prominence and continues to dominate the upper card.
Mayday Malone:
The Pinch Hitter, Mayday Malone is a fan-favourite in SHTCW:a who constantly puts on solid matches no matter her position on the card. She is also the current SHTCW:a World Champion and only the second multi-time champion in the company's history.
Marcel Müller:
The Stuttgart Submission Machine! Marcel Müller is one of Germany's premiere exports on the wrestling scene and builds up to his devastating WünderArmbar (of which he has several variations.) He was relatively unproven in the SHTCW:a and as held multiple championships in his native Germany and has been putting on excellent matches in SHTCW:a's midcard. At the beginning of the new SHTCW:a season, he shot up the rankings and won the SHTCW:a World Championship before being screwed out of it by CeO.
Mr. Piledriver:
The King of the Piledriver, Mr. Piledriver is a high-flying lucha who was once best friends with both Mr. Brainbuster and Señor Powerbomb, but their petty squabbles over who had the best maneuevers got the best of them and they've been sworn enemies ever since, trying to prove whose area of expertise is the most effective in wrestling.
Svetlana Svensdottir:
The bringer of Ragnarok, Svetlana Svensdottir is a Scandinavian-born tank of a woman who may secretly be the strongest competitor in SHTCW:a. She only has one match in SHTCW:a under her belt—a double-countout draw with Fergus Gray in which both competitors knocked each other out outside the ring—but has been making a name for herself throughout all of Europe.
Broham:
The Broiest Bro in all of Brofessional Wrestling. Broham generally opens the card in SHTCW:a shows and is considered a comedy character, but has a surprising amount of strength.
Recently he has teamed up with Beef McHugeBulk to form The Bulk Bros and has found great success in doing so.
Beth Excellent:
The Beth in the World. The Bethellence of Bethecution. 1/2 of the Atomic Blondes, an infrequent tag-team with Regan O'Reilly. Beth Excellent is a submission-based blonde bombshell who will twist you into a pretzel and you will like it. She is arguably, the best submission-based wrestler in SHTCW:a and put on a series of fantastic matches with Marcel Müller that made fans start to take her seriously.
"Dastardly" Darrik Davies:
A relatively unsuccessful heel, Darrik Davies proclaims that he is the WOAT: Worst of All-Time. That is, he is a bad dude. But his win-loss record may prove that he is indeed the worst of all-time.
El Gringo Fantastico:
Though technically part of the lucha division under OSWALD MEGACORP.'s new rules, El Gringo Fantastico denies all association with luchadom and actively tries to wrestle the "anti-lucha" style in protest of his fellow luchas. He has been relatively unsuccessful in not only the win column, but keeping the high-flying lucha action down.
Bronson Fury:
The former MMA competitor-turned wrestler, the Brighton Beast. Bronson Fury is a homegrown talent from the UK that tore up the MMA world before taking the wrestling world by storm. He made his official SHTCW:a debut by decimating Darrik Davies back in November 2017 and took Nikki Knux to a countout draw in December 2017 and looks poised to inflict pain upon the SHTCW:a roster in 2018.
Fergus Gray:
The Big Gray Guy. The Celtic Clobberer. This towering Scot has been with SHTCW:a since nearly the beginning and recently turned heel when he felt that he wasn't getting the respect he deserved. The big man not only delivers a devastating lariat, but can fly as well. He could be a dark horse competitor in the SHTCW:a and quickly rise to the top of its rankings.
Daisha Lee:
Sister of Desmond Lee and self-proclaimed "Catch-as-Catch-Can-Queen", Daisha Lee was trained by Bobby Donnelly and trained very well. She has made a name for herself on the UK independent scene and is poised to try to do the same in SHTCW:a.
Beef McHugeBulk:
The Prince of Protein Shakes. The Swollest of them All. The King of Swole Style. Beef McHugeBulk is the oiliest, sexiest, stealin'-your-girliest wrestler in all of SHTCW:a. He has all the looks in the world, and arguably he has the talent to back it up. He's put on some solid matches since his arrival in early 2016 to SHTCW:a and wants the fame and lifestyle that comes with being a champion.
Mr. Brainbuster:
The one-time friend of the Kings of the Piledriver and Powerbomb respectively, it was Mr. Brainbuster that took things too far and started the seemingly eternal-war between the three. Mr. Brainbuster is out to prove that his preferred method of offense is the best in all of professional wrestling.
No Name:
Not much is known about this man other than he has some of the most vicious striking capabilities going in the SHTCW:a. He has, since his debut on only the fourth SHTCW:a show, compiled impressive wins over the likes of El Hijo Del 8-Bit, Kemper Tierney, Mayday Malone, Lady Dirtbag, CJ Fresh, and even a non-title win over Will Craddock.
Patches:
Patches was a former children's television presenter on the hit kid's television show in the mid-1990s until recently, "Clownin' Around with Patches the Clown", but the pressure eventually got to him after nearly 25 years on the job, and he snapped, assaulting one of the cameramen on set. British TV giant Sky let Patches, real name Oliver "Ollie" Hutchinson, go without explanation. Patches re-emerged in SHTCW:a some months later and CeO attempted to hire the clown under threat of releasing the tape in question of the assault. Patches declined the invitation and released the video himself "because [he] had nothing to lose anyway." The video promptly went viral within mere hours, causing a massive controversy at Sky Kids that resulted in "Clownin' Around with Clowny the Clown", the follow-up to "Clownin' Around with Patches the Clown" to not only be canceled, but the entire production team—the same team that ran "Clownin' Around with Patches the Clown" to be sacked. It was also reveleaed that the camera man in question was paid off, and several members of Sky's HR department and legal team were sacked as well.
Regan O'Reilly:
1/2 of the infrequent tag team, The Atomic Blondes, the Boston native Regan O'Reilly is a suplex and striking machine whose looks betray a bevvy of offensive talent. She is one of the best in the SHTCW:a who is just waiting to have her breakout performance.
Kemper Tierney:
A no-nonsense, towering Amazon of a woman, the self-proclaimed "glamrock queen" Kemper Tierney was a one-time fan-favourite in SHTCW:a who went on a massive losing streak before last season of SHTCW:a. She shocked the audience by not only debuting a new look, but an entirely new moveset and attitude and decimated Mayday Malone, putting Malone on the shelf for several months using her Sickle Hold submission. Ever since, she's been on a tear in SHTCW:a.
She won the SHTCW:a World Championship only to be screwed out of it by CeO. Her allegiances are currently unknown.
Señor Powerbomb:
The King, the Master of the Powerbomb, Señor Powerbomb is the mortal enemy of both Mr. Piledriver and Mr. Brainbuster, out to prove that the Powerbomb is the most devastating move in all of professional wrestling.
Yōkai:
Reportedly the former Joshi freelance sensation, GoGo Tanaka, Yōkai has been a fierce competitor in SHTCW:a since day one, utilizing deadly technique combined with harsh kicks and finishing her opponents with the Briding Figure-Four Leglock. She recently competed in the inaugural FPWA World Cup and though things didn't go her way there, she is SHTCW:a's first-ever NO LIMITS Champion, scoring four CRITS in a row before losing out to PEWA's Tomas.
Alouette:
A relative newcomer on the SHTCW:a scene, Alouette debuted in late 2016 and was signed as part of the new lucha initiative when OSWALD MEGACORP. announced its purchase of SHTCW:a.
She consisently puts on fantastic matches, is a fan favourite, and a contender for the LUCHA CROWN.
DYANMO TIGRESS:
Most certainly not the alter-ego of Midnight Brown, DYNAMO TIGRESS is a high-flying sensation who burst onto the SHTCW:a scene by defeating crowd favourite El Hijo Del 8-Bit and continued to put on fantastic matches throughout her tenure in SHTCW:a so far. She is seldom seen, but when she does make an appearance, she wows the audience every time.
El Hijo Del 8-Bit:
The international 8-bit lucha sensation. You gotta blow on him to make him work sometimes. El Hijo del 8-Bit is a fan favourite in SHTCW:a and has been since day one. He utilizes his high-flying offense to excite the crowd and has in the past put up a fantastic fighting effort against some of SHTCW:a's best.
EL SWAMPO:
Not much is known about EL SWAMPO, a relatively obscure lucha who only appeared in one show early in SHTCW:a's history. She(?) disappeared for months, only to resurface in late 2017 against Oswald MegaCorp. Tiger, where she laid down and let the Tiger pin her.
Recently she has been making more appearances for SHTCW:a.
Enigmatica:
A relative newcomer for SHTCW:a, Enigmatica made a name for herself in Mexico and is steadily building up a reputation for putting on fantastic, high-flying matches. She is a former SHTCW:a LUCHA CROWN holder.
Fantasma Azul:
A beloved hero in his native Mexico, this undersized luchador is part-time at the moment in SHTCW:a, but is an international superstar with not only his own action figures and television series, but even his own cereal. He's kind of a big deal.
Flash the Mighty:
The Saviour of the Universe, Mighty Flash! A quintessential underdog lucha who simply lives to put on a good show for the SHTCW:a crowd.
Golazo:
The beautiful luchador inspired by the beautiful game, Golazo is a new signee for the SHTCW:a's lucha division.
Lady Bird:
Another relative newcomer to the SHTCW:a lucha scene, not much is known about Lady Bird, but she is a former LUCHA CROWN holder.
Machismo:
The manliest lucha in all of the SHTCW:a, Machismo has picked up key wins over several of the SHTCW:a's best-known names and looks to continue his success in this new season of SHTCW:a.
Orchid:
One of the premiere luchadoras in SHTCW:a, Orchid quickly became a fan favourite after a series of matches against Enigmatica tore the house down late last year and she looks to continue that momentum into this new season.
Polaris:
The North Star of professional wrestling, Polaris is a Canadian ex-pat who made his way to SHTCW:a with the influx of Canadian talent in Nikki Knux, The Scott Bros., and dalton taylor. The oversized lucha is arguably one of the lucha divisions hardest hitters and has earned himself a bit of a reputation as the division's premier bad guy.
Rent-a-Tiger:
SHTCW:a's low-budget, affordable tiger extraordinaire, Rent-a-Tiger is an enhancement talent that the fans adore.
Tachyon:
Part of the Intergalactic Time Pirates, the Intergalactic Time Lucha is a fan-favourite in SHTCW:a and a Intergalactic Lucha Champion.
dalton taylor:
The Lower East Side Splatter Punk, dalton taylor is a lucha-inspried punk from the Prairies of Canada. taylor is a part-time worker in SHTCW:a who was convinced to make the trip alongside Nikki Knux, whom he trained with in Canada.
Thunderbird:
Part of the mass immigration of Canadian talent, the native warrior luchadora is solidly in the middle of the SHTCW:a pack.
AMERICAN REVOLT
Buddy Carmichael and Ricky Carmichael:
The Carmichaels were a relatively successful tag-team in America before coming over to SHTCW:a. In their debut match they beat The Scott Bros. and were immediately given a title shot in a tornado tag team match vs. The Scott Bros. and The Beat-Alls. They unfortunately couldn't reproduce their debut success but continue to stay high in the tag-team ranks.
THE BEAT-ALLS
John Pepper and George Eggman:
Arguably the best tag-team in SHTCW:a that took the tag titles off of the Scott Bros. and feuded with them for months leading up to Corum Scott's shoulder injury. Pepper is a clasically-trained catch-as-catch-can submission master whilst Eggman provides the strength for the vicious tag-team.
They are a multi-time tag title-winning team.
THE FLY BOYS
Falconer Northwest and Orville "Lefty" Holloway:
Former WWII pilots turned wrestlers, The Fly Boys are down-to-Earth, red-blooded Americans who just fight for the love of their country and now for the love of beating people up. They've been middle of the road so far in SHTCW:a.
INTERGALACTIC TIME PIRATES
Crash Mezzanine and Persephone Pollux:
Not much is known about this mysterious crew of time pirates other than their successes in Intergalactic Wrestling Warfare, where they have reigned as tag champions through both time and space since The Mesozoic Era and well into the Post-Post-Post Apocalypse.
THE YOUNG LIONS OF LEEDS
Desmond Lee and Rory Warwick:
Arguably the best tag-team in SHTCW:a, The Leeds Young Lions have not won the tag-team gold yet but are just on the cusp and show a bonafide mean-streak and intelligence that belies their relative inexperience in the business. The two work not only amazingly well as a unit, but as singles wrestlers too. It is only a matter of when, not if, that the Young Lions grab SHTCW:a gold.
THE RUDE DUDES WITH 'TUDE
Cadillac Callahan and Tommy Buick:
The Rude Dudes With 'Tude haven't seen much success in SHTCW:a, but recently turned heel on the fans and their change in attitude may be what finally gets them some wins.
THE SCOTT BROS.
Caleb and Corum Scott:
The inaugural SHTCW:a tag-team champions, Caleb and Corum Scott are the quintessential underdog tag-team from small-town, Timmins, Ontario. Both young men were trained alongside Nikki Knux and dalton taylor. The two were riding a long high of wins before an unfortunate shoulder injury to Corum meant they had to vacate their titles. Ever since they've been trying to regain the gold they never lost.
THE SOUL COPS
Midnight Brown and Milkshake Jones:
Two undercover cops from the 1970s who somehow found their way to SHTCW:a in a quantum time conundrum that they can't quite understand. Milkshake Jones has fully embraced this and revels in his new-found moniker of the Soul Brother of SHTCW:a whilst Midnight Brown just wants to get back to her time where she was bustin' heads and solvin' cases. Milkshake loves the spotlight, so these two were an infrequent tag team until a mystical amulet was bestowed upon them by a mysterious force and they used it to win the SHTCW:a Tag Team Titles.
Charles e. Oswald:
Charles estlin Oswald, the CEO of OSWALD MEGACORP. and owner of SHTCW:a. Oswald often does not like to get involved in the ring and was, until recently, not involved whatsoever. As of the purchase of SHTCW:a, though, Oswald weaseled himself into a World Championship tournament and then a title shot. He held the title for several shows before finally losing it to the woman who originally beat him in the World Championship tournament, Mayday Malone.
Crushtron 3000:
Formerly known as UK independent scene journeyman Crusher Stevens, the Ipswich-native was taken under Oswald's wing, and against his will was "enhanced" to become the ruthless cyberg known as Crushtron 3000. He debuted in December 2017, attacking CJ Fresh and Will Craddock in the main event of the "season finale." Since then he has served as CeO's henchman, ruining the SHTCW:a roster.
Bobby Donnelly:
A catch-as-catch-can legend in British Wrestling, Bobby Donnelly not only formed the wildly successful and revolutionary tag-team with his wife Rose, The Donnelly Dynasty, but captured many single titles in a career spanning over 30 years. He also had a large hand in training Will Craddock before Craddock went to Japan. He is now semi-retired.
Rose Donnelly:
The mother to Saoirse and Fyfe Donnelly and wife and tag partnet of Bobby Donnelly. Rose Donnelly is, arguably, one of the best female wrestlers of all-time, and rather tragically, one of the greatest "what-if" stories in professional wrestling. She was on top of the wrestling world in the mid-to-late-80s and looked poised to become a legend when a freak injury sidelined her for over a year. Rather than return to the ring, she took care of her children and stayed retired until her mid-40s. She took up teaching wrestling and still ocassionally tagged with Bobby and remains semi-retired.
EL ZOMBIEDOR: An undead lucha who originally made a one-off appearance for a Halloween show and returned for two more shows after his bite caused a wrestler to bleed and "turn" undead. EL ZOMBIEDOR had control over their henchman for that brief moment in time, but eventually lost to El Hijo Del 8-Bit and has not been seen since.
Red Dragon II: Totally not El Hijo Del 8-Bit, Red Dragon II is a mythic hero of SHTCW:a who was bestowed the moniker by Red Dragon. He is mostly inactive.
Red Dragon: The former alter-ego of Will Craddock, Red Dragon feuded with Nikki Knux and was eventually unmasked in a mask vs. title match when he passed out to his own move, the Dragon Sleeper.
SHTCW:a World Championship
CURRENT CHAMPION: Mayday Malone
June 11th, 2015 - January 11th, 2016: Will Craddock (1)
January 11th, 2016 - February 17th, 2017: Nikki Knux (1)
February 17th - December 21st, 2017: Will Craddock (2)
December 21st, 2017: Title Vacated'
January 13th, 2018 - April 21st, 2018: Mayday Malone (1)
April 21st, 2018 - May 10th, 2018: Marcel Müller (1)
May 10th - May 10th, 2018: Kemper Tierney (1)
May 10th - June 28th: CeO (1)
June 28th - Present: Mayday Malone (2)
SHTCW:a Tag Team Titles
CURRENT CHAMPION: The Soul Cops
November 14th, 2016 - February 17th, 2017: The Scott Bros. (1)
February 17th, 2017 - June 15th, 2017: The Beat-Alls (1)
June 15th, 2017 - October 27th, 2017: The Scott Bros. (2)
October 27th - December 21st, 2017: The Beat-Alls (2)
December 21st, 2017: Title Vacated
February 24th, 2018 - July 5th, 2018 : The Beat-Alls (3)
July 5th, 2018 - Present: The Soul Cops
SHTCW:a Lucha King/Queen
CURRENT King/Queen: Besos
February 3rd, 2018 - May 10th: Lady Bird
May 10th - June 7th: Enigmatica
June 7th - Present: Besos
PREVIOUS SHOWS:
EPISODE ONE (A NEW HOPE):
EPISODE TWO (LUCHA IS FOR EVERYONE!):
EPISODE THREE (WRESTLING IS A LASERQUEST):
EPISODE FOUR (GREATEST HITS LIVE!):
EPISODE FIVE (CATCH ME IF YOU CATCH-AS-CATCH-CAN):
EPISODE SIX (of infinite suplexes and infinite beards):
EPISODE SEVEN (No One Man Should Have All That Power):
EPISODE EIGHT (Whys And Wherefores):
EPISODE NINE (43 / 142 PURO x SHTCW:a):
EPISODE TEN (Wet Hot American Wrestling):
EPISODE ELEVEN (FUTURE IMPERFECT):
SEASON ONE FINALE (RAGE, RAGE AGAINST THE DYING OF THE LIGHT):
