So, I've been trying to put this off but not sure I have any other choice at this point.
Warrior Pro/Lucha POWER will be taking a short recess. How short? Not sure exactly. Maybe we'll be back up and running next week, maybe a little longer. I have a few too many irl commitments to put the correct amount of focus into this, and I can't bring myself to half ass things either. So I'm just going to take a little break and figure out how to retool what I've been doing to fit my current schedule. This isnt a hiatus- I don't plan on being quiet for very long- but more of a callout that I'm taking time to make sure I can keep doing what has become a really fun little hobby.
I'm also not disappearing. So:
-Any outside bookings/angles will still be honored and executed on. If we've been working on angles I intend to see those through.
- Lucha Fantastico is still happening, likely in early/mid March, with a few Warrior Pro house shows sprinkled in as well. When I'm back up and running there will be dates announced for all of that.
Big thanks to everyone that still follows/participates. Hopefully I'm back before you noticed I left...
Lanky, we all completely understand and hope that everything goes smoothly with the real life commitments. I've had to take so many small and large recesses (recessi?) over the course of my e-fed years and real life always comes first. You gotta follow your priorities and also make sure that you have everything in a row so that you can continue e-fedding 😁 Best of luck and hope we see you back here soon with all creative cylinders firing!
Some updates from around the wrestling landscape after an unplanned quiet week…
Last week’s press conference in San Jose to promote the Warrior Pro/Lucha POWER supershow Lucha Fantastico was delayed without reason- and is now scheduled for this Friday. Rumors were swirling that the delay was a sign the show was in jeopardy, but sources confirmed that this was never the case. The delay seemed to stem from a scheduling conflict with El Macho, who never made the trip to San Jose. Instead, there are rumors that he was delayed in Mexico negotiating a big surprise match that should appeal to the US audiences. No news on who those participants are, or if the match is officially signed, but the expectation is it will be announced this week. -----------------------------------------------------------------
In a mild surprise, no wrestlers fought or pushed to appeal their suspension or fine from the disastrous New Dawn post show press conference. The closest protest was rumored to come from Doc Wyatt, who multiple sources confirm payed his fine in full via a giant sack of nickels… -----------------------------------------------------------------
Warrior Pro released their house show schedule leading up to Lucha Fantastico over the weekend. Both shows will feature main events with titles on the line, as well as the first Doc Wyatt match of the new year. As was the case last year, there will be a Warrior Grounds on location in Mexico to help promote the big show.
WARRIOR GROUNDS #16- Feb. 28th Bay Ballerz vs Massholes Markus Winter vs “Flyin” Jimmy Hawkins Warrior Pro IC Championship Match: Robino vs Rampage Hunter
WARRIOR GROUNDS #17- March 6th (Special location- Arena de Antiguo in San Jose Mexico) Byron “Prime Time” Worthy vs Rip Reed “Gentleman” Doc Wyatt vs “Masshole” Tommy O’Malley Warrior Pro Tag Team Championship Match: Gears of War vs McDaniel & Baron -----------------------------------------------------------------
Rampage Hunter was stopped at the San Jose airport this afternoon, seemingly coming off a flight from Miami. When asked about recent events in both PCP and Warrior Pro, he gave this response…
On getting leap frogged for the PCP Title:
“Rampage had to have a long sit-down wit Gambler Gorham. Don’t make no sense that you pass on Rampage to give that little man with a crown a shot he ain’t earned. Money or no money, that ain’t a way to do business you hear? But there ain’t nothing to be done now, cept take it out on those lackey’s, dressed up like some kinda candy cartoon bullshit. So that’s whats gonna happen. Rampage gonna get a partner and blow a hole through these punk ass bitches.
Who gonna be Rampage’s partner? Rampage callin out Big Bama Ray. You n me gone through more than our share of wars. Ain’t no one else on that roster Rampage know gonna blast through these fools. What you say Bama? Lets put the past to the side, beat up some punk ass bitches, and then go back to tearing each other apart.”
On news that he would be the next challenger for Robino’s IC Title:
“To be honest, this aint the title Rampage lookin to win. Been almost a year since Rampage got a crack at the World Title. But Rampage also don’t like an outsider walkin around with a belt he don’t belong walkin around with. So Rampage gonna take that title from Robino. Rampage fixin to take everyone’s title’s in 2020. He gonna need to hire someone to walk with him to the ring, he gonna have so many belts to carry. If Robino want, he can just give Rampage the title right now, save himself the hospital bills. Don’t make no difference.”
Inside the pressroom of Gorilla Hall, both “Lanky” Lefty McDaniel and El Macho- owner of Lucha POWER- stand at a podium prepared to address a combination of local and Mexican reporters….
Macho: Welcome! El Macho is so happy to bring you LUCHA once again! Last year was a very difficult year that is true, but THIS year, Lucha POWER will become the true, KING of Lucha. Mi amigo Lefty McDaniel, with the support of his uncle Tank, will ensure that Lucha POWER is strong, both in Mexico and in the United States, for many many years.
And to do that, Both Senor Lefty and El Macho are proud to announce the card for LUCHA FANTASTICO, which will be broadcast LIVE via Warrior Pro’s home Twitch channel on March 12th!
LUCHA FANTASTICO CARD: Uno Muerte (Struggle) vs Nightmare Clown
Machismo and Machisma (SHTWA) vs “Perfection” Jack Gold/The Mallard
El Macho (w/ Dr. Dorado) vs Felix Santana Sr. (w/ Felix Jr.) (Santana Family Wrestling)
Hexagon Jr/Diego Guerrero vs Los Arboles (La Guerra)
John Logan vs Machine Gun Mayhem II (Steel Cage Ligh Tube Deathmatch)
Warrior Pro World Heavyweight Title: Vic Baron vs Brick Casey
Lucha POWER World Title: Lobo Muerte vs Pantero Negro vs Dungeon Dominguez
Lefty: Wait hold on. We didn’t discuss Logan vs Mayhem. Those are Warrior Pro wrestlers under contract and currently suspended.
Macho: SI! Suspension en America amigo. But we will be fighting in Mexico! Mira- this is a match that the people of Mexico want, a true grudge match, in a steel cage. Covered in light tubes. There is no better place to ensure a definitive outcome! El Macho will make sure of it you will see!
Lefty: Macho this isn’t how it… We can talk later. My uncle and I are proud of this relationship, and we think this show, similar to the supershow we held last year, is a great way to expand the reach of both companies, as well as showcase the excellent Lucha taking place all over the world. To help promote this event, Warrior Pro will be holding a special Warrior Grounds in Mexico the week before LUCHA FANTASTICO that will feature a main event match- myself and Warrior Pro World champion Vic Baron defending our titles against Gears of War.
Macho: With the winner appearing on a future Lucha POWER show to defend the titles! Excellente!
Lefty: What are you talking about?
Macho: Ha HA SI Amigo! It is in the contract!
Reporter: What contract are we talking about here?
Reporter: What is the working relationship between Warrior Pro and Lucha POWER?
Reporter: Have Logan and Machine Gun signed Lucha POWER contracts?
Lefty: I’m sorry no questions- this press conference is over.
Both El Macho and Lefty leave the stage, visibly arguing as they exit the room…
After a rather abnormal press conference announcing LUCHA FANTASTICO, El Macho held a small Q&A with members of the press. Though some reporters were told Lefty McDaniel would be present at the presser, it was announced at the beginning that he would not, and instead was currently on a plane back to Mexico too help coordinate Warrior Grounds 17, which would be taking place in Arena Antiguo next week.
Here are the highlights from the Q&A…
On the state of Lucha POWER with the reign of Bonilla behind him:
Excellente! Lucha POWER has never been better my friend. We have many big plans for this year, many big events with many surprises. Lucha POWER will be the KING of Lucha by the time we speak again next year.
On his new partnership with Warrior Pro Wrestling:
Tank McDaniel and El Macho have been friends for many years. This will be a special relationship and El Macho is very excited to bring Lucha POWER to America, and Warrior Pro to Mexico. You already saw Lobo Muerte win the heavyweight title, how magnifico! And, we will see the Tag Team champions coming to Lucha POWER soon as well. It is all a very exciting time!
On his main event, a three way for the Lucha POWER championship with Dungeon Dominguez defending against Lobo Muerte and Pantero Negro Jr.
Si! Dungeon is the most dominant champion in aaaaall of Lucha, but he will have the challenge of a lifetime. Los Terribles, the superstar cousins, are both worthy contenders, and both failed to defeat Dungeon one on one. But can they one of them do it in if they try together? You will all find out!
Ha! El Macho has had many famous, legendary matches in his time. Some have even tried to take El Macho’s mask. But here El Macho stands, triumphant as ever! El Macho has never faced Felix Santana, nor has he ever wrestled in the famed Santana Family Wrestling. El Macho asked Senor Santana for a match to showcase two legends, two owners of companies proud and rich with history! So to this, El Macho ACCEPTS the offer, and he also offers to buy Felix a hat to cover that bald head of his when this is all over ha HA!
Sandwiched in between the biggest Office show potentially ever, Warrior Grounds returns tomorrow from Gorilla Hall with an exciting card before the promotion moves south to prep for the Lucha Fantastico supershow. The show aims to feature an up and coming tag team, Markus Winter hoping to continue his impressive win streak, and a main event clash for the Intercontinental title.
Before getting to the match previews though, it should also be noted that former champ Doc Wyatt will be facing Lil Lariato in their trilogy match for the Lone Star Championship at Night 2 of Lariats and Legislators this Friday- and boy is he ready for a fight. Be sure to check out both nights at the Senatorial Streaming Service…
Bay Ballerz vs Massholes The Ballerz, lead by iWe legend Super Bad Ass Sweet Daddy Jones, are looking to reclimb the tag team ranks with an eye of getting another shot at tag team gold. Forever the spoilers though, the Massholes will look to sober up enough to make a claim of their own to get a crack at the reigning tag champs, McDaniels and Baron.
Markus Winter vs “Flyin” Jimmy Hawkins On the heels of an impressive victory over Roy Carter, the “Fighting Viking” Markus Winter gets another test in Jimmy Hawkins- who is looking to shake off another failed attempt at the IC title and get back to his winning ways. Can Winter “Call the Gods” and notch another win to propel him into a title picture? Or will Hawkins cut off the young upstart and rebuild his own championship worth?
Warrior Pro IC Championship Match: Robino vs Rampage Hunter Robino, one of the “Famed Four” of iWe has been perfect in his run as Intercontinental Champion, proving that the vet still has plenty in the tank. But he’ll face his stiffest competition yet in Rampage Hunter. Rampage has made a name for himself outside Warrior Pro, defending the Southwest Memorial Championship in Tiger Stripe Pro, and winning a tag match in PCP ahead of his shot at claiming the promotions World Title. Will Robino claim another Warrior Pro victim? Or will Rampage add another belt to his collection?
Find out all of this tomorrow- full matches, recaps and post show promos will be posted right here!
The show kicked off with a promotional video for Lucha FANTASTICO, complete with shots of both the Lucha POWER title fight (a three way match of Lobo Muerte, Pantero Negro Jr, and Dungeon Dominguez) and the Warrior Pro title fight (Vic Baron vs Brick Casey). Afterwards the first match gets under way…
The Bay Ballerz got a front row seat to the Masshole experience in this one. Despite dictating the pace, and including a fair amount of involvement from manager Super Bad Ass, the Ballerz struggled to find enough momentum to put the Bostonian Drunkards away. In the end it seemed like the Massholes did themselves in, as Trey Taylor broke up an armbar and simply rolled up Joey O’Shea for the victory.
After the match the Massholes seemed to not even recognize the loss, continuing to brawl with the Ballerz till security got into the ring to break them up…
There is not a hotter wrestler in the promotion right now than Markus Winter. After what appeared to be a shocking upset of Roy Carter at Warrior Grounds #15, Winter followed that up with a definitive victory over the former #1 contender for the IC title. Hawkins started off the match pushing the pace, but the Winter never seemed to get rattled, and in the end overwhelmed “Flyin” Jimmy before a Winter is Coming sealed another impressive victory.
Winner: Markus Winter Rating: ****
After the match Markus Winter rolled out of the ring and grabbed a mic…
Ha HA! The Gods were with me again tonight! I, Markus Winter, continue to be in their favor. And with Odin at my side, no one can defeat me. You, Jimmy Hawkins, are a great warrior and I hope we can do battle again someday. But for now, I must continue on my path to greatness. I stand before this crown, in the eyes of the Gods, and ask for a match that will bring me FAME AND GOLD. What say you all? What say you Tank? I eagerly await an answer!
Warrior Pro Intercontinental Championship Match: Robino vs Rampage Hunter
For the second consecutive Warrior Grounds, Rampage Hunter put on a MotY candidate. The big man and defending champ Robino had an all-out war from bell to bell. Both men threw everything they could at each other, but it seemed Robino would do what he’s always done since earning the IC title- end the match with a flurry of arm bars and elbow drops that would overwhelm his opponent. But somehow Rampage managed to fight out of every one, and a devastating spear seemed to crumple the champ and lead to the first IC title change since the belt was introduced last summer.
Rampage picked up Robino, they both exchanged words and shared a handshake, as Robino left the ring. Rampage stayed, belt in hand and seemed ready to address the crown when suddenly King Felix III- Port City Pro’s newest World Champion- backed by Orders of Myths raced to the ring from the crowd and jumped an exhausted IC champion. Rampage, who is next in line for King Felix’s belt, was quickly overwhelmed before being put in the Broken Pillar of Live leglock by the PCP champ. Finally security jumped in and the intruders fled back through the crowd. The show went off the air as medical tended to Rampage.
Warrior Pro landed in Mexico today ahead of Warrior Grounds #17 and Lucha Fantastico next week, and with it a ton of news as many of the wrestlers have been very available to the local media in a push to promote both shows. Some of the highlights from what should be an event filled week…
Uno Muerte, who will be making his Lucha POWER debut next weekagainst Nightmare Clown, did not fly with the rest of the Warrior Pro roster, who had covered air travel for all outside talent booked for Lucha FANTSASTICO. Uno’s camp gave no comment other than an insistence that he had every intention of being at the show.
All three participants in the main event of Lucha FANTASTICO have been doing media separately. Dungeon Dominguez, Lobo Muerte, and Pantero Negro Jr have a heavy history with each other and sources say officials are trying to ensure that no one does something that might jeopardize the show. That said, there is still scheduled to be a joint press conference next week with all three men that is sure to be an eventful one.
El Macho offered up his first public quotes regarding his current relationship with La Guerra de Sangre, the promotion that briefly bought out Lucha POWER last summer. Though most of the comments seemed intentionally vague, it was confirmed that there is dialogue between the two companies, even pointing to Los Arboles being booked next week as evidence. Sources indicate that the companies are on working terms but that Lefty McDaniel seems to be reaching out to the wrestlers directly, with little to no communication happening with David Harley.
A two-part interview with Warrior Pro Champion Vic Baron and challenger Brick Casey is scheduled to air next week.
One Warrior Pro wrestler who has made himself very available is recent Lone Star Champion Doc Wyatt. The former Warrior Pro champ has been booked on everything from morning shows to local radio, mainly talking about his recent win and his future title plans. From the feedback we’ve gotten, it appears Doc has heavily hyped his match this week at Warrior Grounds vs Tommy O’Malley as well as gone out of his way to not mention the Lucha FANTASTICO show he was not booked on.
One star who did not make the trip is Rampage Hunter, who was left home to rest up from the beating he suffered from King Felix III following his IC title victory over Robino. It is believed that none of his injuries are long term, and that he will have a public statement coming soon regarding the attack and his upcoming match with Felix.
In one of the more awkward interviews of the day, Lefty McDaniel emphasized that both John Logan and Machine Gun Mayhem were both still suspended and barred from media promotion, while admitting that there was little that the company could do to prevent their scheduled rematch from happening at Lucha FANTASTICO next week. Despite the media muzzle, there are rumblings that we will hear from both MGM and Logan before the show, and it will be interesting if there are any repercussions from their home fed.
The current Mexico mini tour is as follows:
WARRIOR GROUNDS #17- March 6th (Special location- Arena de Antiguo in San Jose Mexico) Byron “Prime Time” Worthy vs Rip Reed “Gentleman” Doc Wyatt vs “Masshole” Tommy O’Malley Warrior Pro Tag Team Championship Match: Gears of War vs McDaniel & Baron
LUCHA FANTASTICO- March 12th @630pm PT LIVE on TWITCH: Uno Muerto (Struggle) vs Nightmare Clown Machismo and Machisma (SHTWA) vs “Perfection” Jack Gold/The Mallard Hexagon Jr/Diego Guerrero vs Los Arboles (La Guerra)
John Logan vs Machine Gun Mayhem II (Steel Cage Light Tube Deathmatch)
Lucha de Apuestas (Mask vs Hair): El Macho (w/ Dr. Dorado) vs Felix Santana Sr. (w/ Felix Jr.) (Santana Family Wrestling)
Warrior Pro World Heavyweight Title: Vic Baron vs Brick Casey
Lucha POWER World Title: Lobo Muerte vs Pantero Negro Jr vs Dungeon Dominguez
In what is becoming an annual tradition, Warrior Pro Wrestling takes Warrior Grounds #17 on the road tomorrow and broadcasts from Mexico City. Besides being a rare chance to see the promotion on the road, this will also act as a go home show for the cross promotional event Lucha FANTASTICO that will air LIVE next week.
Match Previews: Byron “Prime Time” Worthy vs Rip Reed Prime Time is looking to start off 2020 on the right foot with a win over Rip Reed. Rip, the younger of the Reed Brothers is no slouch in singles competition- expect this to be fast paced and hard hitting as both of these young up and comers have something to prove. The ultimate question will be how much the Jackson Hole Outlaws get involved to ensure a Worthy victory.
“Gentleman” Doc Wyatt vs “Masshole” Tommy O’Malley This will be Doc’s first match of 2020 in Warrior Pro and his first time wrestling since losing his title back in November. The former champ will have an extra big chip on his shoulder given his calls for a title match have gone without answer from owner Tank McDaniel. His opponent will be without his tag team partner as Joey O’Shea was not allowed past the border due to what is rumored to be a prior arrest in Tijuana. If Tommy can stay somewhat sober before the opening bell this could be a show stealer, otherwise look for a quick Doc finish and a lot of gloating.
Warrior Pro Tag Team Championship Match: Gears of War vs McDaniel & Baron (c) The reigning tag team champions will defend their belts for the second straight time on a Warrior Grounds show. This will be a tough test, as Gears of War take aim at becoming the first two-time champions. Will the champs be properly prepared given Vic’s first World Title defense will be only a week away? Can Gears of War return to the top of the mountain after a disappointing end to their 2019 year?
We’ll have all these questions answered tomorrow at Warrior Grounds #17!
Unfortunately Warrior Grounds #17 is getting delayed and will be up over the weekend (likely as early as Saturday morning). Little too much RL stuff going on and I just couldn't finish it. In the meantime, check out the Senatorial Streaming Service to see SWA: Takayamania Empire- which will no doubt be well worth your time.
With Lucha FANTASTICO under a week away, Warrior Pro Wrestling ran its annual Warrior Grounds in Arena de Antiguo, headlined by a tag team title match and the first Warrior Pro match for Doc Wyatt, on the heels of his Lone Star Championship win.
The show opens with a promotional video for Lucha FANTASTICO, claiming a quadruple main event of Vic Baron vs Brick Casey, a mask vs hair match with El Macho and Felix Santana Sr, a Light Tube Deathmatch with John Logan vs Machine Gun Mayhem, and a triple threat match pitting Dungeon Dominguez, Lobo Muerte, and Pantero Negro Jr.
Worthy came out with Roy Carter and Rip came out with his brother Maverick. Rip was the heavy fan favorite since he’s spent time in Mexico before signing with Warrior Pro. A show stealer of a match, with both guys looking like future stars. As Roy looked to get involved early, it was actually Maverick Reed that distracted the ref from counting a Worthy pin, and a livid Byron Worthy left himself open to Rip Reed scoring the huge upset.
Winner: Rip Reed Rating: ****
After the match Roy and Byron looked to jump the Reeds, but the brothers escaped through the crowd, celebrating and mocking as the Jackson Hole Outlaws fumed in the ring…
“Gentleman” Doc Wyatt vs “Masshole” Tommy O’Malley
This match was shockingly close, with Tommy taking it to the Lone Star champ and putting him on his heels for most of this match. At one point it even seemed like an upset was inevitable, until Doc was able to fire back and his Black Gold for the win.
Winner: Doc Wyatt Rating: ****
After the match Doc held Tommy in a headlock and seemed to be shit talking him as the rest of the Outlaws got into the ring, clearing out the ref and stomping on Tommy before tossing him out for good measure. Doc then turned and asked for a mic…
"What a dump this place is. Why Tank insists on coming here every year is beyond me- you people are the worst. But that’s not what I have to talk about. No, I don’t give two shits about Luchamania or whatever you idiots are calling it. Let Vic and Brick slap fight and claim the mantle of best paper champion. I’m on the first plan outta here tomorrow morning. But Cowboy Johnston. Cowboy I hope you’re watching this. You want this Lone Star belt? You think you earned your shot? Why… exactly? Who have you beat? I mean at this point you’d think Cogburn Ranch would want a break from me slapping them around. Maybe not? Well I have to admit, I'm getting bored with it. However I do have someone that would like a word with you…"
Doc passes the mic to Red Masterson…
"Cowboy Johnston. You broke ma ribs two months ago you sonovabitch. You tried to wreck ma livelihood. Ruin ma career. We aint don with each other, not ba a long shot. You wanna shot at this here title? Yer gonna have to go through me ti get it.
As fer that lovely wife a yers. She a little cross eyed, a little haggardly lookin. But she sure seemed to be takin a likin to me. She got fire in her eyes that’s for damn sure. So honey, if you need a ride with a real bronco- saddle up. We may need to putt a bag over yah, but Red Masterson will surely make certain you git home happy…"
The Outlaws exit the ring to a round of boos…
Warrior Pro Tag Team Championship Match: Gears of War vs McDaniel & Baron
A focused, determined Gears of War is a scary scary thing. Vic Baron and Lefty McDaniel have been impressive in their recent run as champs but GoW seemed to be ready for everything, and had a sound strategy from the opening bell, isolate Lefty and beat the tar out of him. McDaniel held tough through repeated choke slams but the final one was met with a “pop” in his shoulder and ended the match with a doctor stoppage.
Winner: Rating: ***
After the match, Vic helped Lefty to the back, his left arm visibly limp as Gears of War celebrated in the ring
As we sit a little more than a day away from Lucha FANTASTICO, Lucha POWER held a large presser for the show at Arena de Antiguo where most of the card were made available to the media. Here are the highlights…
Lucha FANTASTICO will be streamed LIVE tomorrow night at 6:30pm PT on TWITCH.
From El Macho's press conference with the local media...
Macho confirmed that Lefty McDaniel flew back to the states to get a second opinion on what he fears is a torn labrum. The injury was suffered at Warrior Grounds #17 during a failed title defense against Gears of War.
It is interesting to note that with Lefty gone, there will be no one from Warrior Pro management present at the show. Tank and Austin Baron did not make the trip, instead staying back in California to assess how the coronavirus might impact future shows.
Macho also reiterated that he is not afraid of Felix Santana unmasking him, and that he is very excited to see how the senior Santana looks without hair…
Vic Baron and Brick Casey’s joint interview that was scheduled to be broadcast on WPW.com never aired, and no information was given as to why. Though they were again interviewed at the presser and its easy to see why the build up to their match has been so quiet. Vic has stuck to generic answers of wanting to prove himself and live up to the family legacy, while Brick has kept to not saying much at all. Vic did however light up when Doc Wyatt’s name came up…
Its not really a surprise to anyone that piece of trash has been runnin his mouth since he lost the title. Thinkin he got screwed, that everyone is out to get him and blah blah blah. I ain’t gonna run from Doc. You want a shot? Shit if I manage to get past that wall of a man over there, you sure as shit can get it. But… there’s a catch. Being as I’m from Texas, I gotta stick up for my fellow Texans. So you can have your shot once you give Cowboy Johnston his shot at that Lone Star Title.
An interview panel with Lobo Muerte, Pantero Negro Jr and Dungeon Dominguez never got started because the two cousins almost immediately started a fight, with Dungeon grabbing the title and walking off the stage without answering a single question.
Still barred from doing any media on Warrior Pro Wrestling mandate, John Logan and Machine Gun Mayhem were nowhere to be seen, though multiple reports have both men in the country for at least the past week.
In related news, STRUGGLE Pro luchador Uno Muerte, who is scheduled to wrestle Nightmare Clown, is currently en route to Mexico for Lucha FANTASTICO, according to a statement released on his personal Facebook account from the parking lot of a south Texas Whataburger restaurant. STRUGGLE officials reportedly suggested - begged, even - that he take a bus or a train instead, but out of an abundance of caution over the current coronavirus pandemic, he hired an Uber driver instead at great expense to his employer and at great inconvenience to his driver, who had to call in sick to his other three jobs. STRUGGLE head booker Uncle Abdul has been quoted as saying "yeah, it's lookin' like he'll get there in time, but the little shit is gonna bankrupt us by the time is over. These dipshits are gonna give me cancer, I swear to fuckin' God. Wait, you're just gonna report the 'he'll be there on time' part and leave the rest of this out, right?" It is unclear whether Muerte has offered to pay for his driver's cheeseburger.