i.W.e. Legends These distinguished gentlemen are all based either on characters I handled in old forum-based roleplay e-feds in the late 1990s and early 2000s, or characters others handled in e-feds that I operated during that same time frame.
Brad Kuelman B2K For more than fifteen years, Brad Kuelman has competed at the highest levels of the i.W.e. A perennial World Heavyweight title contender, B2K and his archrival Super Bad Ass Sweet Daddy Jones have traded the belt back and forth more times than anyone can count. Simply put, Brad Kuelman is better than most anyone, and he spends a lot of his time in the ring rubbing that fact in his opponent's face, if he isn't too busy displaying his breakdancing prowess. The Tallahassee native is famous for his fallaway slams and a particularly painful application of the Sharpshooter, and is generally thought of as an out-and-out suplex machine.
Super Bad Ass Sweet Daddy Jones S.B.A.S.D.J. The longest name in professional wrestling... and you best not leave a single syllable out, sucka! He is widely considered to be the greatest in-ring performer in the annals of i.W.e. history, and his epic, decades-long feuds with Brad Kuelman and Robino are the stuff of legend. Born into a poor family in the ghetto of East Oakland, he was well on his way to a life of crime as a teenage street thug before attempting to rob I.W.A. founder David Harley, who whooped him good and proper but was nonetheless impressed with the young man's gusto and took him under his wing. Debuting in 1999 at the age of 19, he has long abandoned his original gimmick - a funky, floppy-hatted pimp; David's idea - and developed an eloquent but often goofy gangsta persona that has endeared him to fans for nearly twenty years.
David Harley The Head Honcho Having founded the Insane Wrestling Association while rehabilitating a back injury way back in 1998, David Harley has sold off his assets in the company and come out of retirement for the umpteenth time. His main claim to fame is being the man who discovered and signed Super Bad Ass Sweet Daddy Jones to a professional wrestling contract, and at various times throughout the years has served as S.B.A.S.D.J.'s manager, agent, and attorney, among other things. Known for a vicious, scrappy style punctuated by explosive powerbombs, David's still got quite a lot of fight left in him for a guy in his mid-forties.
Robino (Rob O'Reilly) The Flying Irishman From the mean streets of Worcester, Massachusetts, this hardscrabble high-flyer has been a top-tier performer in the i.W.e. since its inception almost two decades ago.
Obnoxio The Hardcore Clown This dastardly and diabolical clown is what nightmares are made of. In the ring, he is known for his incessant cartwheeling and less-than-legal tactics.
"Magnificent" Max Mosley The Technowizard The i.W.e.'s most talented mat technician, Max Mosley's swift and spry approach to wrestling has scored him quite a few startling upsets in his career.
J.C. Lamb The In-Ring Evangelist He's come all the way from Colorado Springs to convert each and every heathen he can get his hands on, by persuasion or pinfall! J.C. Lamb, the patron saint of professional wrestling, is here to let you know that the kingdom of heaven shall soon be at hand. A proud bible-believing Christian, J.C. is never afraid to bow his head in prayer and consult with The Man Upstairs about his next move... even in the middle of a match! According to several waitresses who have come forward, he's a notoriously poor tipper, often leaving only an autographed gospel tract.
Hoss Haskins High Plains Drifter This old ranch hand from Laredo, Texas got tired of tending livestock and turned to professional wrestling to make a living instead. He's been known to employ every variation of lariat ever invented, and can hog-tie a human in about ten seconds flat.
Broederbond A stable of sinister heels who may or may not be Nazis.
Ziegenfuss Der Satyr This sinister German is poised to demonstrate his genetic superiority in the ring, but anyone who's ever seen him with his boots off might call that superiority into question. Rumor has it he was born with a birth defect that causes his feet to resemble the cloven hooves of a goat.
Hammerskin The Skinhead Fiercely loyal to his leader, Hammerskin never leaves Ziegenfuss' side.
Crookshanks The Convict His continued employment as a professional wrestler is a condition of Crookshanks' work release.
Ocelot The Wildcat Ocelot is the most celebrated luchador in sW history, but his advanced age is quickly beginning to catch up to him. He now lacks a lot of that cat-like spring in his step he used to be so famous for. Word around the locker room is that he's used up eight of his nine lives (being a cat and all), and the next time he's critical'd could very well end his career for good. Perhaps that explains his careful approach around the ring in recent years.
Raccoon Dog Junichiro Tanuki He is perhaps the most promising prospect in the company, which is not particularly surprising when you consider he's the legendary Ocelot's protege. An exceptionally agile fighter, Raccoon Dog is a speed demon between the ropes and typically defeats opponents with a rapidfire flurry of flying feet. His top rope flying stomp rush is one of the odder sequences you'll see in sports entertainment, but it seems to work well for him.
The Earth Protectorate A stable of bumbling alien hunters who can't discern between masked wrestlers and extraterrestrials.
Tinfoil Hat The Conspiracy Theorist Considered to be the "brains" behind The Earth Protectorate, it is Tinfoil Hat's harebrained conspiracy theories that the group usually acts upon. Convinced that the government has ways of tapping into his thoughts, he has modified a lucha mask with a little bit of aluminum to foil The Man's nefarious plans.
Phil Phazer The Space Marine Phil Phazer is a footsoldier on the frontline of Earth's efforts to resist the impending alien onslaught.
Thor Templar Alien Assassin According to himself, Thor Templar has executed no less than a dozen extraterrestrials with his own two hands during his illustrious career as America's leading alien hunter.
Tiburanha La Phantasma del Mar Tiburanha is the result of a scientific experiment gone wrong. This terrifying frankenfish was created by splicing a shark, a piranha, and a luchador together.
Ultimo Grande The Peter Pan of Lucha Libre Your great grandparents can still recall seeing Ultimo Grande wrestle back when they were kids... and yet somehow he's still going strong. The crafty old rudo's career seems to have spanned an entire century, and yet he hasn't aged a lick.
Silverfish Slippery Man Just like his animal kingdom equivalent, nobody likes Silverfish.
Johnny Hairspray The Aquanet Addict This raunchy rocker from L.A. got hooked on hairspray and hardcore wrestling at an early age, and never passes up an opportunity to introduce an illegal object to a wrestling match.
Puke Bucket The Gutterpunk Originally discovered while panhandling outside of an I.W.A. event, he was thrown onto the card when another performer no-showed and has been wrestling ever since. It's the only job he's ever been able to hold down for more than a few days at a time.
Ravendark The Metalhead This nasty Norwegian turned to professional wrestling after realizing he had no particular talent for playing black metal music, but still wanted to wear corpsepaint on a daily basis.
The Vaughn Family A not particularly prestigious family of wrestlers.
Sterling Vaughn The Golden Boy Unlike the other Vaughn brothers, Sterling actually shows an impressive aptitude inside the squared circle, but audiences are already sick of how hard he's pushed by his father Percival Vaughn, who just so happens to be the i.W.e. commissioner.
Ron Vaughn The Thin Man Long and lanky, tall and twig-like, if there's one word to describe Ron Vaughn, it's "gangly." Not a particularly impressive wrestler, he simply uses his towering height to add a little extra oomph to vertical suplexes and hopes for the best.
Melvin The Nerd The runt of the litter, itty bitty little Melvin spends most of his time in the squared circle actively avoiding any sort of confrontation. However, every once in a blue moon something strange comes over him, and his far more confident and smoothly sophisticated alter-ego Mel Vaughn makes an appearance.
Bear Flag Revolt A loose affiliation of Northern Californians.
Cameron Parker The Pride of El Dorado County Cameron Parker has emerged as a force to be reckoned with in the i.W.e. World Heavyweight title scene. His in-ring style simply exudes raw power, and it seems only a matter of time until he wins his first championship.
Cole Canyon The Castro Valley Kid This fast and flashy junior has a high-energy, all-or-nothing approach in the ring, frequently attempting dangerous dives and big bombastic slams.
Don Castro El Temblor This wily old grappler has traveled far and wide, getting deserving young stars over and embarrassing the overconfident.